Utah Residents Love Balls • College Dean Puts Kibosh On "Douchebag Party"

Illustration for article titled Utah Residents Love Balls • College Dean Puts Kibosh On Douchebag Party

The Testicle Festival in Utah drew "hundreds" looking for a chance to eat balls (bull's balls to be exact) this past weekend. Think Alec Baldwin made an appearance? • An Italian court of appeals has ruled that wives forfeit their rights to shared assets if they use their marital bed for infidelities. • A NY teen who was arrested for a DUI claims she blew a .15 blood-alcohol level because she made out with a drunk boy. • Plan your life around your menstrual cycle! Including the "worst" time to do coke and when "nature conspires to make you pregnant" by making you walk sexier. • Party-pooping dean of students at Seattle University shuts down "Douchebag Party" for gender bias. • Although the International Olympic Committee states it is against gender discrimination, it still allows countries that ban female athletes to compete. • Women who have caesareans are sometimes denied insurance coverage or are made to pay higher premiums. • Two men rob a Colorado convenience store with thong masks. • Eager 95-year-old man proposes to 95-year-old girlfriend on the first date, gets married 18 months later. • Men and women metabolize fructose differently, making some doctors rethink the factor of gender in the study of metabolic disorders.

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Did you guys see that the menstrual study said women get anxious and jittery right before they start their period? Clearly those Dr.'s ain't seen MY jittery. I'd jitter their ass into the ground, you bet.