Usher's Sort of Nude Selfies Don't Make Me Wanna

Illustration for article titled Ushers Sort of Nude Selfies Dont Make Me Wanna

Uh...

Our collective teen crush Usher hopped on Snapchat on Thursday to share selfies that show him luxuriating in his steam room, in an attempt to create a thirst session. Unfortunately, the thirst backfired.

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BuzzFeed describes these pics as “godly,” but they are not living in reality. Snapchat is the worst angle for nude selfies. Usher can do way better than this.

Illustration for article titled Ushers Sort of Nude Selfies Dont Make Me Wanna
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The above is a fine set-up for what should be an enticing thirst experience.

Illustration for article titled Ushers Sort of Nude Selfies Dont Make Me Wanna

But then Usher shows us what it might be like to have sex with a seal (not Seal, a seal) in this blurry shot.

Illustration for article titled Ushers Sort of Nude Selfies Dont Make Me Wanna
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What an unfortunate angle. You can see a bit of his peen, but it’s censored and his legs look like action figures’ legs.

Illustration for article titled Ushers Sort of Nude Selfies Dont Make Me Wanna
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It’s sad when your heroes disappoint you. But he’s still an attractive, if overly thirsty, man.


Images via BuzzFeed/Snapchat

Culture Editor, Jezebel

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DISCUSSION

thetallblonde

oh my god all those angles make him look scrawny and i feel like i’m looking at a 12 year old

am i gonna go to jail for this?