Toddlers & Tiaras: Crowning A Little Boy As "Little Miss Glitz"

On last night’s season premiere, two of the four children featured were boys whose mothers entered them into the Little Miss Glitz pageant. Of her son, one mother said,”He’s so beautiful that he looks like a girl.”

Cruz is 22-months-old and his mother and father consider themselves an “entertainment family,” because the mom sings and the dad is in a cheerleading act. They’re both into the idea of Cruz becoming a celebrity, so that he could “support mom and dad for once.”

They might need all the support they can get, considering the father’s career.

Another mother has entered both of her children—a 3-year-old girl and an 18-month-old boy—into the pageant. Their names are Angelle and Maddox, respectively, and something tells me their mother reads a lot of celebrity weeklies.

Angelle’s mother decided to put her in pageants before she was even born. She has continued keeping Angelle in the pageant circuit, despite the fact that the girl repeatedly tells her—in many ways—how much she hates it. The child says “no” so much that it seems almost an involuntary response.

Angelle hates everything about the pageants—the makeup, the hair, the routines—but she particularly hates to practice. This might be why there are spare handcuffs hanging around the playroom.

By the end of the episode, Angelle’s mother admitted to herself that perhaps it was time to quit living vicariously through her daughter. So instead, she resolved that she’d live vicariously through her son, Maddox, who ended up taking home the grand prize and was crowned Little Miss Glitz.

At least now with his Little Miss Glitz crown, his mother can stop telling people that his biggest accomplishment was “surviving his birth.”

On rare occasions, there are kids who are actually so completely into pageants and glitz, like 3-year-old Kinley. It seemed far-fetched when her mother said that competing in pageants was Kinley’s idea, but after watching her behavior during the show, and her excitement about makeup, I’d say that was accurate. (BTW, there’s something about this child that reminds me so much of Paula Abdul.)