- Ugh: Britney Spears could lose custody of her kids this morning! Attorney Gloria Allred is bringing a "secret" witness to court today, who could ruin Britney's chances of keeping Sean Preston and Jayden James. Who is the secret witness? Is it the "manny"? "You may recognize him as we walk into court," Allred says. "But maybe not. He is not famous. He's just someone who's concerned about the kids." [Fox News]
- In other Britney news, The Sun reports that Britney is banned from the exclusive hotel Chateau Marmont after guests complained about her "weird" behavior. Brit allegedly smeared a plate of food all over her face. Maybe she didn't want to be recognized? [Page Six]
- The rumor that Marilyn Manson was seen in a club asking for coke after a screening of girlfriend Evan Rachel Wood's film has been denied by the film's publicist. High-larious! [Gatecrasher]
- Owen Wilson: Seen hanging on beach with brother — and with a visible wrist scar. [Daily Mail]
- Madonna met with Israel's president Shimon Peres over the weekend. We assume she left the purple penetrator at home. [CNN]
- LL Cool J has been working on a clothing line for 5 1/2 years. "It's not going to be ghetto," he says. Yeah, but will it be worth it? [Gatecrasher, 4th item]
- Blind item! "Which young MTV reality star had to be cleaned up considerably before he was ready for his closeup? The still under-age hellion has been spotted in bars since he was 16, say locals." [Gatecrasher, last item]
- Uma Thurman and "Arki" Arpad Busson have broken up, probably because he is a "lothario." [Daily Mail]
- Brad Pitt speaks: "Angelina is my love, my partner and the mother of my children. We're a normal family - a mother, a father and kids." [Mirror]
- Speaking of kids... Is Angelina Jolie pregnant? [Daily Mail]
- Lily Allen's credit card was declined at Chanel in London. When she tried to call the bank, the battery on her phone ran out. We find this endearing. [The Sun]
- Paris Hilton on friend Adrian Grenier: "I think it's cool to talk to someone in L.A. who has more to talk about than all this artificial crap people talk about. It's nice to talk to someone who's real." [People]
- Amy Winehouse: seen walking the streets with a bloody handkerchief on her finger. Oh no! Did she try to fix that paronychia herself? [Daily Mail]
I only realized recently that Amy Winehouse is actually younger than I am by nine months. I see this as a cautionary tale.
And every new Lily Allen story I hear makes me love her more. That's just the type of back-to-back bad luck that happens to normal people. Like when my cell phone broke within twenty minutes of getting fired from my last job.