Today In World Cup Abdominals: Get Me To The Greek

Dimitrios Salpingidis draws the obvious Greek god commentary — but oh, what we would give to be his buddy Giorgias Karagounis. Never wash that hand, friend.

Meanwhile, France’s loss to Mexico was our win, thanks to William Gallas. Cheer up, Monsieur — you are still a champion of hard-bodied athleticism.