On Valentine’s Day, the octopuses at the Seattle Aquarium are typically afforded the opportunity to get a little nasty — so long as they don’t mind a gaggle of human voyeurs. But this year, there was no octo-sexing, for fear of coital cannibalism.

As Komo News reports, “Aquarium staff say they’re afraid that their male octopus—a 70-pound cephalopod named Kong—is too big for the females who are 30 to 40 pounds, and he may eat them.”


Well, isn’t that just typical? Even in the animal kingdom, fossilized—see what I did there?—patriarchy keeps coming up with new ways of policing female sexuality.

Kong, however, “will be released back into the Puget Sound Monday at noon.” Here’s hoping he’s a gentle suitor in his future mating endeavors. He only gets one shot, after all: “octopuses only live about three or four years and mate once at the end of their lives. Then they die.”

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Contact the author at rachel.vorona.cote@jezebel.com.

Image via Shutterstock.

Share This Story

Get our newsletter