The Only Pep Talk You Will Ever Need

Have you ever wondered what would happen if Michael Scott and Tony Robbins had a love child? Here is your answer. This dude’s name is Chad Goldwasser, and he is the Chief Excitement Officer at something called the Goldwasser Institute, which offers products which will “inspire you to break through to the next level and realize there are no limits!” (He also looks like he’s probably written a few of these…)

Anyway, Chad has clearly snorted up a big ol’ line of all the good that life has to offer, and he is ready to AMP YOU UP. You might not think you even need to be amped up, but trust me, you do. So let Chad’s tepid clichés wash over you, and then—once the music and off-key singing start—you will know in your racing heart that he is right. We gotta fight! Fight! Fight! Ad infinitum.

And, listen, if, for some some strange reason, you aren’t buying it—if you don’t feel like being a leader—go ahead and make fun of him because he has already said that he does not care what you think of him!