Everyone Drowns in Semen in the Jizzy NSFW Trailer for Love
Gaspar Noé’s forthcoming film Love, which premiered at Cannes last month, has already been hailed as “the most sexually…
One Man's Ode to His 'Liquid Fucking Gold' Sperm
"LaidNYC" purports to be a NY-based pick-up artist; you may know him from past rhetorical standouts like "Don't Marry…
A Complete Breakdown of the Nutritional Content of Semen
To swallow or not to swallow: that is the question. You can only really answer it for yourself, but we aim to help you…
Watch the New Diet Coke Hunk Get a Soda-Jizz Facial
While regular sugar-filled Coke is focusing on "happy calories" and joy, Diet Coke reminds you that bubbles are sexy,…
Personhood Starts With Paul Ryan's Jizz
Wisconsin Congressman, Romney running mate, and widow's peak cultivator Paul Ryan has again cosponsored the Sanctity of…
Most Graphic Condom Ad Ever Features Fake Bukkake, For Some Reason
There are a myriad of good reasons to use condoms — preventing the spread STD's, staving off pregnancy... erm, the…
Get Your Jizz While the Getting's Good: Sperm Quality and Quantity Is Declining
In some parts of the world, there has been a considerable decline in sperm quality and quantity in recent years,…
Science Confirms That With Sex, Size Actually Does Matter
It turns out that it doesn't matter how fast sperm can swim when it comes to fertilizing an egg—it's all about its…
Got Morning Sickness? Give Two Blow Jobs and Call Me in the Morning
No amount of heavy duty feminism can alleviate the fact that when it comes to child creation, all a guy really must do…
American Men Are Almost Too Awesome At Making Jizz
While our manufacturing sector's kind of in the toilet, mining is giving people cancer and causing earthquakes, and our…
Zimbabwe's 'Sperm Hunters' Are Coming for Your Semen
Gangs of women in Zimbabwe have been capturing male hitchhikers — sometimes by drugging them, other times by holding…
A New Recipe for High Quality Semen
Women have been clued into the fact that their diets affect their fertility for a long while now, but a new study has…
In New Porn-y Ad, Chocolate Stands In For Semen
Chocolate and intimacy go hand in hand. It's often (incorrectly) thought to be an aphrodisiac; it's associated with…
Man Ejaculates Into Female Coworker's Water Bottle As Sign of Adoration
One California man is redefining the DoubleShot infused specialty drink by including his spooj in a female coworker's…
Polish Your Beauty Routine With Jizz
To follow up on Dickweed (shown) the girls at BleachBlack have announced their second nail polish: Jizz. It is a…
From The Department Of Vom
You really must be careful when using the words "come," "on," and "meat" in a food advertisement about a mayonnaise…
Today's News Is Brought To You By Andy Samberg's Soiled Pants
It used to be that this venerable feature was inspired by the news, hangovers, and/or funny pictures. But The Huff…
"Should I Wax My Buttcrack?"
It's time for another installment of Pot Psychology, the advice column in which everyone's problems are solved with an…
CNN's Howard Kurtz: Just Call Them 'Jizzable'
It might seem like we're about to beat a dead horse, but we're not, promise! See, Jezebel got a shout out on CNN's Relia…