Unfortunately for, uh, all citizens of Earth, the Girls reality show is apparently underway: ABC has picked it up and already chosen a star, a 25-year-old publicist named Hailey Glassman whose achievements include, hand to God, dating Jon Gosselin and being on an episode of My Life is A Lifetime Movie. She's also…

Is Meg Ryan Dating Newly Separated John Mellencamp?

Lauri Apple

1/01/11 10:30am

Reportedly, John Mellencamp (nee Cougar) has "struck up a friendship" with the actress, who has apparently "dropped in" on his tour. Mellencamp and his supermodel wife of 18 years, Elaine Mellencamp (nee Irwin), just announced they're splitting up. Oooh!

Dirt Bag

Michael Lohan Swears Off Speaking To The Press About Lindsay

Margaret Hartmann

10/20/10 7:16pm

142

On the eve of Lindsay Lohan's probation violation hearing, Michael Lohan has issued a statement saying he'll never speak to the media about her again, after having a "conversation last night, with someone who means alot [sic] to me."

Lil Wayne Tweets From Jail

Tracie Egan Morrissey

8/10/10 7:30pm

190

Today in Tweet Beat, Lil Wayne is Tweeting remotely, while Q-Tip is sorta biting Kanye's Tweet style, and sorta failing at it.

January's Crash Involved Alcohol, Bobby Flay; Jodie Denies Attacking Teen "Paparazzo"

Margaret Hartmann

6/11/10 7:30pm

196

January Jones claims she crashed into three parked cars last night because paparazzi were chasing her, but witnesses say she was alone — and smelled of alcohol. Also, in a bizarre twist, January called Bobby Flay to the scene.

Dirt Bag

Heidi And Spencer Split; Celebrities Remember Gary Coleman

Hortense Smith

5/29/10 10:45am

309

After roughly a year and a half of marriage, Heidi Montag has reportedly kicked Spencer Pratt (and, presumably, his crystals) to the curb:

Elizabeth Taylor Is Not Engaged; Scott Baio Pays Taxes For "Lazy" People

Tracie Egan Morrissey

4/12/10 8:00pm

421

Today in Tweet Beat, Elizabeth Taylor addresses rumors that she will marry for the ninth time, Hailey Glassman is looking forward to celebrating 4/20, and Marlon Wayans stands up for celebrity Twitter rights.

Kristen Bell Goes Barefoot Today For Something Or Other

Tracie Egan Morrissey

4/08/10 8:00pm

204

Today in Tweet Beat, a shoe company pays Kristen Bell to go barefoot for the day to raise awareness about shoelessness, Dita Von Teese explains the torture of glamor, and Andrew WK, age 10.

Lindsay's Future Step-Mom Was Her Assistant; Survivor Producer Arrested After Wife Found Dead

Margaret Hartmann

4/08/10 7:40pm

150

Michael Lohan won't have to introduce Lindsay Lohan to his fiancée Kate Major — Back in 2007 she was Lindsay's assistant/close friend. Kate even picked Lindsay up from rehab, but Linds dropped her when she started getting close to Michael.

Jim Carrey & Jenny McCarthy Throw In The Towel Via Twitter

Tracie Egan Morrissey

4/06/10 8:00pm

186

Today in Tweet Beat, Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy are "grateful" but not dating, Diablo Cody is pregs, and Michael Jackson's dermatologist claims that MJ didn't like to shoot up.

Dirt Bag

Nicolette Alleges Abuse; Jesse James Has Lots Of Sex Tapes

Dodai Stewart

4/06/10 9:00am

215

Nicolette Sheridan is suing her former employer, Desperate Housewives creator Marc Cherry, claiming he physically abused her on the set.

Dirt Bag

More Plastic Surgery For Heidi; Sandra Fears Jesse Will Kill Her

Margaret Hartmann

4/05/10 7:45pm

290

Today on Ryan Seacrest's radio show, Heidi Montag revealed that in addition to the 10 recent plastic surgery procedures we know about, she also had her waist cinched and her "back scooped." Wondering what that is? Heidi has no idea:

Dirt Bag

Details Of Springsteen Affair Start To Surface; Former Employee Claims Brad And Angelina's Relationship Is "A Total Sham"

Hortense Smith

4/04/10 10:30am

259

Bruce Springsteen allegedly had an affair with a New Jersey housewife named Ann Kelly back in 2005; details of the affair are now beginning to surface thanks to divorce papers filed by Kelly's husband in March of last year.

Dirt Bag

Ross And Rachel Are No Longer Friends; Amy Winehouse "Wants A Baby"

Hortense Smith

3/28/10 10:35am

232

Jennifer Aniston and David Schwimmer are reportedly no longer talking after Aniston admitted while on The Late Show with David Letterman that she didn't know who Schwimmer's fiance was:

Dirt Bag

Beyoncé Might Be Pregnant; Sandra Might Appear At Kids' Choice Awards

Dodai Stewart

3/26/10 9:00am

175

According to an unconfirmed report on an unreliable website and repeated by a newspaper, Beyoncé is pregnant.

Spencer Pratt Is Confused About The Health Care Debate

Tracie Egan Morrissey

3/19/10 7:00pm

128

Today in Tweet Beat, Spencer Pratt asks followers for help on what's going on with health care, Martha Stewart gives her horse acupuncture, and Adrianne Curry has rape fantasies.

Hailey Glassman To Film Her First Movie

Tracie Egan Morrissey

3/17/10 8:00pm

122

Today in Tweet Beat, Hailey Glassman is trying her hand at acting, this day in history, Debbie Gibson filmed her "Foolish Beat" video, and celebs celebrate St. Patrick's Day.

For Sale: Syringe Used To Kill Michael; Tiger Returns To Golf

Margaret Hartmann

3/16/10 6:40pm

Someone is trying to sell the needle Dr. Conrad Murray allegedly used to give Michael Jackson the drugs that killed him to Las Vegas auction houses for $5 million. A source explains:

Dirt Bag

Vanessa's Threatened By Angie; Snooki Thinks Lindsay Is "Gross"

Dodai Stewart

3/04/10 9:00am

248

This report claims that when Vanessa Paradis found out that her partner of 12 years, Johnny Depp, was supposed to shoot passionate love scenes with Angelina Jolie in The Tourist, she "ordered" him to quit the project.

Tyra Introduces ANTM Cycle 14 Girls On Twitter

Tracie Egan Morrissey

3/02/10 8:00pm

212

Today in Tweet Beat, check out the girls of America's Next Top Model cycle 14. Also, Hailey Glassman makes fun of Jon Gosselin's penis size again, this time, with a picture. (Link NSFW and NSF souls!)