"Come as you are...and we will crush you," says Grunge, raising its trophy high above its greasy, unwashed head.

We always knew it, didn't we, that it would somehow come down to this. Two sides of the same industry, seemingly at odds, but both needing each other to exist. In the 80s stadium, we have MTV — the VJs, the I Want Mys, the music videos and the commercialism. For the 90s we have Grunge — the melancholia, the plaid, the…

We have entered the final four of our 80s vs. 90s March Madness and can I just say that I'm a little relieved? Not only am I barely managing the pressure of seeing my favorites drop like flies from the running (Prince is gone, but never forgotten), but I have run clean out of 80s vs. 90s pop culture references...See?…

Whoa. WHOA. Did that really just happen?! Did Gameboy really beat out East Coast vs. West Coast Rap by less than 100 votes?! Important question for all you conspiracy theorists out there — did East Coast vs. West Coast Rap really lose or did it just fake its own death and is now chilling out on some remote island…

Welcome the the Elite Eight! Yesterday, voters decided to say no to D.A.R.E and yes to MTV (Daren the Lion would be so disappointed in you) and poor Monica Lewinsky still can't catch a break, having lost to the Seattle Sound by a whopping 3,670 votes. Oh, well. She can always go back to her career as a purse designer.

There wasn't too much of a contest yesterday as the Brat Pack knocked The Cosby Show clean out of March Madness with 60% of the vote (I'm sorry, Theo! Judd Nelson is just too damn tough!) and the Spice Girls sank Titanic with one swift Girl Power kick to James Cameron's nards. Safe to say that while Cosby and Titanic…

If you ever had any doubt about the legitimacy of our March Madness voting system, know this: If I was rigging these brackets, I would have never ever let what happened yesterday happen. Sure, the Gameboy beat the Rachel. This I can let go, but Lisa Frank beating Valley Girls? Gag me with a spoon — now I finally know…

Sorry, Carson Daly. Bye bye, Debbie Gibson and Tiffany. You have been officially eliminated from the '80s vs. '90s March Madness bracket with TRL being drive-byed out of the running by East Coast vs. West Coast Rap and the girls falling victim, like so many '80s pop icons before them, to the power of cocaine. Be sure…

Hello sports fans! March Madness dribbles on. There was blood on the court yesterday: MTV absolutely slaughtered Ms. Pacman with 82% of the votes, and Team Grunge put a beat down on poor old Macaulay Culkin, winning 74% of the votes. Pour some out for the fallen homies real quick, and then move on: We've got our Sweet…

Nancy Reagan would be so proud! Yesterday, D.A.R.E. (to say no to drugs) knocked poor Baby Jessica out of the running and back into her soggy cramped well, while over in the '90s conference, Monica Lewinsky gave the boot to Delia*s, matching bedding, corduroy maxi skirts and all.

So far, our 80s vs 90s March Madness has yielded some surprising results — not so much though yesterday when the Brat Pack easily beat out Brooke Shields for Calvin Klein (nothing comes between her and her Calvins, but the Brat Pack comes between her and a win) and Titanic smashed Crystal Pepsi much like the ice burg…

Holy Toledo! The Cosby Show has officially knocked Prince clean out of the race! How could this have happened? (I don't know, but I'm guessing that Raven-Symoné is behind it.) And that's just the 80s conference. Over in the 90s stadium, we had another tight race, but, in the end, the Spice Girls werr able to push…

A new day, a new 80s vs. 90s March Madness nail biter. Last Friday, the technicolor unicorns of Lisa Frank impaled the Cabbage Patch Kids out of the running while, over on the 90s side, the Rachel — a haircut that defined a generation — used its choppy layers to sweep Prince and his assless pants right off the…

80s vs. 90s March Madness barrels along with Valley girls knocking perms out of the running in the 80s bracket and Game Boys taking it on like Donkey Kong to defeat 90210 on the 90s side of the tracks, which reminds me — are you guys fucking serious? Game Boy over 90210? Despite my disappointment in you, the…

Welcome back to March Madness, friends! Yesterday was a tough battle in both conferences. In the 80s amphitheater, Debbie Gibson and Tiffany crushed The Coreys. Girl power! Over at 90s stadium, TRL kicked the ass of Urkel and the TGIF crew. But the fun's not over! We have more matchups today! (Don't forget to update…

Hooooweeeee! Welcome back to March Madness: 80s vs. 90s and it is a hot one out there today! Yesterday, cocaine snorted its way to a victory over New Coke and East Coast vs. West Coast rap put aside their differences and teamed up to defeat that beret-wearing, mustachioed pest to the West Saddam Hussein. But now onto…

And so it begins! It's day one of our fourth annual March Madness tournament, and this year is a battle for nostalgic supremacy: 80s versus 90s. Gameplay begins today with the top and bottom seeds facing off for a shot at the next round. It's David and Goliath in jelly shoes and leg warmers.

March can be a cruel month, sulking on the precipice of spring but full of winter's leftover discharge, with little to speak for other than the promise of green beer and general sadness. March Madness is pretty much the only thing saving the entire month from being thrown off the calendar. So without any further…