Sunday Sign-Off: Celebrate Your Well-Intentioned Grandparents

Today is National Grandparents Day, and has been since 1978. If your grandparents are still alive (and if they’re not, you know, dicks to you), maybe call them and ask for a card that contains a check for $17, and be thankful, because at least your grandparents didn’t hire weird Europeans to fuck with your hair (I mean, hopefully they didn’t do that).