Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere

Bright Star, the potentially-awesome, potentially-ludicrous Keats biopic, premiered last night at New York's Paris Theatre. The results? Let's just say they fell short of the Romantics' ideal. Unless that included see-through bodysuits without bras, that is!

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Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere

Ben Whishaw plays Keats. Yes. Verily. And yeah, I rejected working in Keats quotations in every caption. I accept your thanks from afar.


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Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere

Abbie Cornish looks stunning. And I hope she appreciates the fact that I once wrote a really mediocre paper in college defending Fanny Brawne against the interpretation of some long-dead literary critic. I'm guessing she doesn't though.


Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere

Jennifer Missoni wears peacock. Not in the top hat-goggles-frosted-tips-Mystery sense.


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Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere

Sofia Coppola demonstrates a look I like to call "Miami Frump" which is much easier to pull off when one is Marc Jacobs' muse.


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Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere

Well. Damien Fahey and Grasie Mercedes look remarkably pleased with themselves for two people who are about to sit through a bodice-ripper about a poet with TB.


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Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere

Lynn Collins' skirt reminds me of the awesome ballad "Raggle Taggle Gypsies," which is the only silver lining here. That song, by the way, is allegedly based upon the real story of Lady Jane Hamilton, wife of John Kennedy, 6th Earl of Cassilis, who ran off with an outlaw, and was imprisoned as a result.


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Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere

Jessica Chastain makes a strong case for the enduring appeal of the LBD.


Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere
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Roberta Armani, meanwhile, looks exactly as you'd expect one who bears that name to look.


Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere
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Anika Noni Rose's top has apparently caught on a nail and the bottom half has unraveled. Bummer. I hate it when that happens.


Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere
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If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. Fran Drescher is benefiting from this maxim right now.


Illustration for article titled Stars Bright, Stars Hideous At emBright Star/em Premiere
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Doesn't Jane Campion look exactly as you'd imagine? Okay, maybe I didn't imagine the peace sign. But I can work with it.

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