South Dakota Removes Ads Demanding Drivers Stop Jerking It

In a move that surprised many people who enjoy a good joke about masturbation, South Dakota has decided that their plan to ensure safe driving while employing puns about touching oneself all over until orgasm were ill-advised. No one knows how they even came up with the idea, but I assume some ingenious advertising exec thought that like climaxing into a dirty sock, saving the lives of yourself and other must feel pretty fucking good.

Regardless of the fact that the ads have been pulled (and pulled and pulled and…ah), South Dakota still expects its motorists to maintain their decorum while driving and to keep both hands on the appropriate instruments. But not on the driver’s instrument, because that would be dangerous. Almost as dangerous as masturbating in the living room when you don’t know if your roommate is home and/or would be down with that sort of thing.

Update: Just to clarify, South Dakota wasn’t worried about motorists actually mastrubating, they were encouraging younger drivers to drive more safely.