Sitemap: 2021 January | Jezebel

1/30/2021 - Saturday Night Social: Congrats to Abigail Thorn!

1/30/2021 - Sophie Made You Feel

1/30/2021 - Sarah Jessica Parker Terrorizes Vulnerable Public by Suggesting That Carrie's a Podcaster

1/29/2021 - Farewell to Our Dearly Beloved Chelsea Beck

1/29/2021 - Your First Job Horror Stories

1/29/2021 - Miley Cyrus's Smoker's Rasp Makes for a Great, Gritty Cover of Mazzy Star's 'Fade Into You'

1/29/2021 - This "Birthday" Insurance Rule Covering Children Is Extremely Fucked Up!

1/29/2021 - When Are We Confronting Mary? A Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Holiness Ranking

1/29/2021 - A Trump-Era Villain and an Alleged Rapist Have Made What Looks to Be A Truly Terrible Movie

1/29/2021 - What's a Few Covid-19 Vaccines Between Young, Non-Immunocompromised Friends?

1/29/2021 - For Some Reason, Drew Barrymore Seems Surprised That Dakota Johnson Graduated High School

1/29/2021 - Guards Suspended From New Jersey Prison Where Women Are 'Regularly Sexually Assaulted'

1/29/2021 - Crisis! The Hamptons Are a Sewage-Swamped, Caviar-Deficient Mess

1/29/2021 - Gay Media Please Raise Your Standards

1/29/2021 - Sorry to Liz Cheney But Your Party's Present and Future Is Racist Trolls Like Matt Gaetz

1/29/2021 - Is This the End of Hillsong? Megachurch Hit With $20 Million Lawsuit for 'Immoral' Acts

1/29/2021 - Following the Capitol Insurrection, White Nationalist Novels Surge In Popularity

1/28/2021 - Carey Mulligan On Criticism of Her Attractiveness in 'Promising Young Woman'

1/28/2021 - Award-Winning Actress Cicely Tyson Has Died at 96

1/28/2021 - Jane Krakowski Is Definitely Not Dating the MyPillow CEO—Because She's Dating Someone Else

1/28/2021 - Elizabeth Warren Has Also Heard of a Little Thing Called GameStop

1/28/2021 - As the Tuna Salad Debate Rages On, the Real Victim Is Our Relationships

1/28/2021 - All the Virgin Islands Residents I Begged for Information About 'Homeless' Mike Pence's Luxury St. Croix Vacation

1/28/2021 - The Tackiest Reality TV Mansion in America Is Now For Sale

1/28/2021 - Anna Wintour's Moving to New Jersey

1/28/2021 - What to Make of Claudia Conway's Domestic Violence Allegations

1/28/2021 - Doesn't Mommy Look Pretty?

1/28/2021 - Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene Endorses the Violent Deaths of Her Democratic Colleagues; Republicans Suggest Stern Talking To

1/28/2021 - Poland Has Banned Almost All Abortions, a Disaster for Reproductive Rights

1/28/2021 - As Taylor Swift's Self-Appointed Biggest Fan... What the Hell

1/28/2021 - Rebel Wilson Discovers People Treat Women Better After They Lose Weight

1/28/2021 - We Have to Save Books from the Book People

1/27/2021 - Cloris Leachman, Actor and Comedic Icon, Dies at 94

1/27/2021 - Amendment to South Carolina Abortion Bill Requires Doctors to Give Patients' Names to Authorities

1/27/2021 - Britney Spears' Former Assistant Isn't Sure What a Conservatorship Is, But She's Pretty Sure Britney Doesn't Deserve It

1/27/2021 - Proud Boys Leader Was a Snitch for the Feds, Doesn't Recall Snitching to the Feds

1/27/2021 - New York Times Editor Who 'Resigned' After Publishing the Tom Cotton Op-Ed Is Unsurprisingly Awful in Other Ways

1/27/2021 - My Pussy Is Out For Jesus at the Coronavirus Prom

1/27/2021 - There Is No Good Reason for Dionne Warwick to Know the Word Stonks

1/27/2021 - Not Even Regal Poet Amanda Gorman Can Class Up the Super Bowl

1/27/2021 - Halsey's Pregnant!

1/27/2021 - The Morality Play of Pandemic Shaming

1/27/2021 - When I Die Please Recycle Me and Make My Body an Iris Van Herpen Dress

1/27/2021 - The First Real World Cast Members Might Be Reuniting For a New Show

1/27/2021 - The Pick-Up Artists Found Their Final Form at the Capitol Siege

1/27/2021 - We Tried the TikTok Booty Leggings to See If We Could See Our Ass From the Front

1/27/2021 - Soon-To-Be Divorcée Kim Kardashian West Has a Kanye 'Exit Plan' Ready to Go

1/27/2021 - Sen. Josh Hawley Has a History of Supporting Anti-Government Militia Groups

1/26/2021 - Oregon Assault Case Dismissed After Witness Refuses Court's Demand to Testify Without a Mask

1/26/2021 - Marjorie Taylor Greene's Old Facebook Posts Endorsed A Wild Conspiracy Theory About Hillary Clinton

1/26/2021 - Shockingly, Another Famous Person Is On an Island Vacation During the Pandemic

1/26/2021 - You (Almost) Did It, Joe

1/26/2021 - Adding to His Possibly Fake Breakup Saga, MyPillow Guy Also Dumped By Twitter

1/26/2021 - There's No Vaccine For Being a Selfish Piece of Shit

1/26/2021 - Remember Puppetry of the Penis?

1/26/2021 - Remembering Gianna Bryant and the Collective Grief of Her Tragic, Untimely Death

1/26/2021 - I Will Destroy Anyone Who Tries to Fuck With JoJo Siwa

1/26/2021 - Dr. Pimple Popper Treats Someone With a Tennis Ball-Sized Lump in His Neck

1/26/2021 - Rep. Katie Porter Ventures Into Ted Cruz's Head, Finds an Empty Whiteboard

1/26/2021 - Nearly 40 Women Reach Court Settlement in Harvey Weinstein Sexual Misconduct Case

1/26/2021 - The Bachelor? More Like America's Next Top Bully

1/26/2021 - FKA Twigs On Shia LaBeouf's 'Controlling' Behavior: 'I Wasn't Allowed to Look Men in the Eye'

1/26/2021 - Remembering Rahmbamarama, the Obama Era's Most Zealous Fan Community

1/26/2021 - It Turns Out Lying About Election Fraud Can Get Really Expensive

1/25/2021 - Keira Knightley Will No Longer Be Shooting Sex Scenes Directed By Men

1/25/2021 - Shockingly, There's No Evidence of a Pandemic Baby Boom

1/25/2021 - Larsa Pippen Seems to Have Waded Into Some Tiger King Drama

1/25/2021 - Democrats Should Absolutely Put Mitch McConnell In Timeout

1/25/2021 - I Can't Stop Looking at Suzanne Somers's $8 Million, Zebra-Upholstered Sex Nest

1/25/2021 - Genuinely Good News! It Seems Like the Harriet Tubman $20 Bill Is Actually Going to Happen

1/25/2021 - J.Lo's Forced 'Love Don't Cost a Thing' Challenge Is Dead in the Water, Along With Her Fitbit

1/25/2021 - The Iconic Babies of Bling Empire

1/25/2021 - Asia Argento Alleges The Fast and the Furious Director Rob Cohen Drugged and Raped Her

1/25/2021 - Who Among the Drag Race Queens Can Dethrone Symone?

1/25/2021 - How Can I Explain: An Incomplete Oral History of Asian Americans and Our Ineffable Love of New Wave

1/25/2021 - Just a Few Observations From Sarah Huckabee Sanders's Long-Ass Campaign Announcement Video

1/25/2021 - Paige Lorenze Details Harrowing Abuse Allegations Against Ex Armie Hammer, Including Branding

1/25/2021 - Lifetime's Wendy Williams Movies Celebrate the Host in All Her Messy Glory

1/25/2021 - The Era of the Ellen DeGeneres Show Might Be Coming to an End

1/25/2021 - Inspiring: No One Will Hire Former Trump Staffers, But Now They Get to Pull Themselves Up by Their Bootstraps

1/25/2021 - The Intertwining Lives of a Notorious Abortionist and America's First Woman Doctor

1/25/2021 - Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker Are Dating, Proving the Drummer Is Always the Hottest

1/25/2021 - Inside the Caliphate Debacle, and Exactly Who Is Allowed to Fail

1/25/2021 - Biden Is Getting Rid of Trump's Trans Military Ban

1/24/2021 - Let's Check in and See How the Media Covered the First Few Days of the Biden Presidency

1/24/2021 - Oh God, Please No

1/24/2021 - Simone Biles's Shower Is Better Than Kylie Jenner's...I Guess???

1/24/2021 - Here's That Additional Covid-Related Stress You Didn't Ask For

1/24/2021 - A Capitol Stormer Who Tweeted 'Assassinate AOC' Was Arrested

1/24/2021 - The Newly Out JoJo Siwa Says She's 'Never Ever, Ever, Ever Been This Happy'

1/23/2021 - Saturday Night Social: Can't Wait to Watch This Show About My All-Time Favorite Scammer

1/23/2021 - In Shocking Twist, Guy Who Sucks Lied

1/23/2021 - Who Is Impersonating Lili Reinhart and Why Are They Doing It So Boringly

1/22/2021 - Goodbye To All That Barf

1/22/2021 - The Happiest You've Ever Been to See a Co-Worker Leave

1/22/2021 - Billie Eilish & Rosalía Are Serving Looks and Satan With 'Lo Vas a Olvidar'

1/22/2021 - It's Official: She Gay

1/22/2021 - Some Bernie Memes That Are Not Sexist

1/22/2021 - The Voice of Someone's Generation Finally Speaks

1/22/2021 - America Beginning to Wonder if Money Might Be the Solution to Child Poverty After All

1/22/2021 - Sad and Depressing Life of Jenna Ryan Now Sadder and More Depressing

1/22/2021 - Sorry, What Is Wrong With Everyone?

1/22/2021 - Police Investigating Kellyanne Conway After Daughter Posts Abuse Allegations Online

1/22/2021 - Shocking News Y'all: Lakynn's Mom Whitens Her Teeth, Also Is a Trump-Supporting Covid Denier

1/22/2021 - Red Table Talk Gives Green Light for Olivia Jade To Vlog About Salad Again

1/22/2021 - Actual Paralympians Think Madison Cawthorn's Paralympics Posts Are Bullshit

1/22/2021 - Who Gave Dave Chappelle Covid?

1/22/2021 - We Asked a Therapist How the Hell Lawmakers Still Traumatized by The Insurrection Are Supposed to Do Their Jobs

1/22/2021 - Instacart Continues Its Impressive Commitment to Exploitation By Firing Its Only Unionized Workers

1/21/2021 - New York State May Finally Repeal "Walking While Trans" Loitering Law

1/21/2021 - Dallas County Scrapped Vaccination Plan Prioritizing Communities of Color After Resistance From the State

1/21/2021 - Maybe Getting Engaged After Two Weeks Isn't the Key to a Long-Lasting Marriage

1/21/2021 - Tweeting From Her Home in the Sewers, Marjorie Taylor Greene Calls for Kamala Harris Presidency

1/21/2021 - It Would Be So Much Easier for This Man to Move If This Were the Peoria Skyline

1/21/2021 - Blame It All on Whitney: A Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Holiness Ranking

1/21/2021 - Tiny Pretty Things and the Timeless Allure of Ballet Dramas

1/21/2021 - Revisiting the Catty Art World of Gallery Girls

1/21/2021 - Gay Culture Is gaysovercovid

1/21/2021 - Unfortunately, the Note Katy Perry Was Searching For During the Inauguration Concert Has Died

1/21/2021 - Feds Say Zip Tie Guy Filmed The Whole Coup With an iPhone Strapped to His Chest

1/21/2021 - Biden Will End the Unconscionable Anti-Abortion Global Gag Rule, Just Like Every Democratic President Since Reagan

1/21/2021 - Is This a 30 Rock Plotline Come to Life Or Am I Being Punked?

1/21/2021 - Biden Administration Will Attempt to Correct 10,000 Years of Sexism With a Gender Equality Council

1/21/2021 - In a Heartwarming Sign, Joe Biden Began His Presidency By Upsetting TERFs

1/21/2021 - It's a New Day In America and Ted Cruz Is Still an Irredeemable Dumbass

1/21/2021 - Maybe Garth Brooks Did Get Celebratory Inauguration Hairplugs

1/21/2021 - The New White House Press Secretary Doesn't Seem to Hate the Press

1/20/2021 - Officer Who Diverted Capitol Riot Mob Escorts Kamala Harris to Inauguration

1/20/2021 - Danny Masterson Pleaded Not Guilty to Rape Charges

1/20/2021 - Now the Authorities Are Involved With Armie Hammer's Finsta

1/20/2021 - QAnon Tearily, Tragically Reckoning With the Shock That Biden Is President

1/20/2021 - New Radicals Guy Totally Wore the Bucket Hat—America Is Back, Baby

1/20/2021 - Important American Talents Cruelly Ignored By Parade Across America

1/20/2021 - Bernie Sanders Got That Geriatric Drip

1/20/2021 - Mississippi Is Trying to Criminalize Even Talking About Abortion

1/20/2021 - Eric and Tiffany Trump, the 'Other' Children, Were Just As Complicit

1/20/2021 - Moms Are Boycotting a Trump-Supporting Baby Sleep Expert

1/20/2021 - All the Best Looks From the Biden-Harris Inauguration

1/20/2021 - OK, Now I Cry

1/20/2021 - Paws Up, Little Monsters

1/20/2021 - Bill Clinton Wears His Mask Like Every Man in a Suburban Grocery Store

1/20/2021 - Vice President Kamala Harris Just Made History

1/20/2021 - Michelle Obama Did the Purple Unity Thing Right

1/20/2021 - DHS Leaders Kirstjen Nielsen and Chad Wolf Should Never Shake the Stain of Caging Children

1/20/2021 - Donald Trump Jr, the Biggest Blowhard and Fool, Is the Natural Torchbearer of Trumpism

1/20/2021 - Holy Crap We're Having So Many Feelings: An Inauguration Day Liveblog

1/20/2021 - Bye, Bitch!!!!!!! The Final Goodbye

1/20/2021 - Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, Please Just Get Divorced Already

1/20/2021 - Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Kayleigh McEnany Were Trump's Enthusiastic Cleanup Crew

1/20/2021 - Stephen Miller Used the White House to Enshrine Racist Terror

1/20/2021 - Goodbye to Seema Verma, the Trump Appointee Who Desperately Tried to Anoint Herself a Girlboss

1/20/2021 - Mike Pence, a Bigot and Coward, Who Made the Chaos Make Sense

1/20/2021 - Four Years Later, Melania Trump Still Doesn't Deserve Your Sympathy

1/20/2021 - 'Tiger King' Star Joe Exotic Believes Trump Will Give Him A Last Minute Pardon

1/19/2021 - Surprise: a Lot of Fucking People Are Watching Netflix!

1/19/2021 - Youngest Ever Inaugural Poet Amanda Gorman Hopes There Is "A Breath For Joy" In Her Poem

1/19/2021 - Bachelorette Clare Crawley and Fiancée Dale Moss Have Split

1/19/2021 - Not to Alarm Anyone, But Mitch McConnell Is Starting to Think This Trump Character Might Be Bad News

1/19/2021 - The Wild Ride of Hope Hicks, From Gossip Girl to Lying for Her Fascist Boss

1/19/2021 - Rudy Giuliani Was the Court Jester at The End of the World

1/19/2021 - Remember When Dianne Feinstein Helped the Night Stalker Get Away

1/19/2021 - Betsy Devos Detested the DOE as Much as She Did Children

1/19/2021 - Watch Team USA Celebrate Their Goals With Some Awkward, Socially Distanced High-Fives

1/19/2021 - Princess Betrothed as Royal Family Flees

1/19/2021 - Sean Spicer Proved That Evil Can Look Clownish and Pathetic

1/19/2021 - Gwyneth Paltrow's Pussy (Candle) Goes Boom

1/19/2021 - Hugh Grant Retweeting Elizabeth Hurley Is a Moment

1/19/2021 - Ivanka Trump Played at Benevolence While Leaving a Trail of Blood

1/19/2021 - Donald Trump May Be Gone, But His Legacy Will Haunt Us for Generations

1/19/2021 - Get Ready For More Legislation Targeting Trans Youth

1/19/2021 - Mets General Manager Fired 4 Years After He Pushed a Woman Reporter Out of Industry With Dick Pic Harassment

1/19/2021 - Dr. Pimple Popper Goes Head-to-Head With a Nipple... on Someone's Head

1/19/2021 - Ashley Biden Talks Inauguration, First Daughter Role, and Melania Trump Snub in First TV Interview

1/19/2021 - Ana de Armas Got Breakup Bangs!

1/19/2021 - House Rep Says Gun Congresswoman Lauren Boebert Gave a Tour Just Before the Capitol Riot

1/18/2021 - Finally, Hannah Arendt and the March for Life Founder Get to Be Friends in Trump's Garden of Heroes

1/18/2021 - In Memoriam: Ben Affleck and Ana de Armas, the Perfect Tabloid Couple

1/18/2021 - Woman Who Stormed Capitol MAY Have Taken Nancy Pelosi's Laptop and MAY Have Intended to Give It to Russia

1/18/2021 - Friends Reunion Unable to Be Stopped by the Forces of Nature

1/17/2021 - When Kamala Harris Resigns Her Seat, There Will Be No Black Women in the Senate

1/17/2021 - The Call Is Coming from Inside the Capitol

1/17/2021 - Apparently They're Just Like, Selling Presidential Pardons

1/17/2021 - I Had to Wonder...What the Heck Would Caitlyn Jenner Do in the Sex and the City Reboot?

1/17/2021 - Covid's 'Going to Get Worse Before It Gets Better,' Biden Administration Official Warns

1/17/2021 - BREAKING: Lindsey Graham Thinks Impeachment Trial Bad

1/17/2021 - Good News, Everyone!

1/16/2021 - Absolutely Not

1/16/2021 - Saturday Night Social: Jezebel Dot Com Wants YOU to Eat a Hot Pocket With Glass in It

1/16/2021 - I Am Once Again Asking You to Focus on Armie Hammer's Alleged Abuse

1/15/2021 - Nancy Pelosi Is Big Mad

1/15/2021 - The Time You Completely Lost Your Shit

1/15/2021 - Lana Del Rey Sure Wants You To Think She's 'Not Unhinged or Unhappy… Just Wild' on 'Chemtrails Over the Country Club'

1/15/2021 - Jenna Ryan, Texas Real Estate Agent Who Chartered a Private Plane to Storm the Capitol, Has Been Charged

1/15/2021 - The Concept 'This Monday' Has Been Canceled Until Further Notice

1/15/2021 - My Ex-Boyfriend Henrik Lundqvist Is Recovering Well After Open Heart Surgery, Thank You For Asking

1/15/2021 - This Rich TikTok Star Painted Her Tesla Pink

1/15/2021 - The Cops Who Rioted in the Capitol Abandoned 'Law and Order' to Justify Violently Attacking Law Enforcement

1/15/2021 - I'm in Love With Jennifer Coolidge's Perfect, Functional Kitchen

1/15/2021 - Be Best Is Finished After Attaining Its Goal of Informing Every American to Be Best

1/15/2021 - On a Very Special Episode of Drew, Carrie Underwood Reveals Her Fear of Turtles

1/15/2021 - Welcome, Comrade Snapchat

1/15/2021 - Aunt Becky's Husband Mossimo Giannulli Reportedly in Solitary Confinement, Requests To Leave Prison Early

1/15/2021 - How Brilliant Makeup Artist Pat McGrath Invents Her Otherworldly Looks

1/14/2021 - White Women Helped Incite the Violence At the Capitol Too

1/14/2021 - Finally, a Proposed Relief Plan That Actually Recognizes People Are Struggling

1/14/2021 - Kesha Has Joined Demi Lovato in Trying to Use Meditation to Connect With Aliens

1/14/2021 - I Cannot Believe I Am Yas Queening Joe Biden

1/14/2021 - 'Girl, Why You So Thirsty For Love': A Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Holiness Ranking

1/14/2021 - Don't Let Those Wild Armie Hammer Texts Obscure His Alleged Abuse

1/14/2021 - Dear Fuck-Up: Should I Warn an Organization About a Rapist?

1/14/2021 - What Does One Wear to a Second Impeachment?

1/14/2021 - Why Won't Ivanka and Jared Let Their Secret Service Detail Shit In Any of Their 6.5 Bathrooms?

1/14/2021 - Uber Suddenly Cares About 'Retraumatizing' Sexual Assault Survivors When Faced with a $54 Million Fine

1/14/2021 - Editing Trump Out of Movies Is Not Bold, It's Cowardly and Ahistoric

1/14/2021 - A Kardashian Divorce Built to Last for a Million Years

1/14/2021 - Inside the World War I Hospital Run and Staffed by Women

1/14/2021 - Trump Doesn't Want to Pay His Lawyer to Lose Anymore

1/14/2021 - Ariel Pink Accused of Sexual Misconduct and Physical Abuse

1/14/2021 - Armie Hammer Denies 'Vicious and Spurious' Sexts, Drops Out of Jennifer Lopez Movie

1/14/2021 - Ex-Michigan Governor Rick Snyder Charged for His Role in the Flint Water Crisis

1/13/2021 - Biden Plans to Majorly Expand Child Tax Credit in His Relief Plan Proposal

1/13/2021 - After the Insurrection, Black Cleaning Staff Were Left to Pick Up the Pieces: Report

1/13/2021 - Don't Hire Kevin Bacon to Do Your Bikini Wax, Advises Kyra Sedgwick

1/13/2021 - Hope Floats For Good

1/13/2021 - This Dude Got Impeached Twice

1/13/2021 - Republicans Boo Cori Bush for Telling the Truth

1/13/2021 - The Triumph of Fascist Aesthetics

1/13/2021 - Hell Yes, Real Housewives of New Jersey Is Back

1/13/2021 - Just Some Regular Pictures of Simon Cowell Vibing

1/13/2021 - Honestly Owning Lizzie Borden's Murder House Sounds Like a Fucking Chore

1/13/2021 - Jim Jordan Self-Cancels, Once Again

1/13/2021 - Here Is Why Olivia Rodrigo & Her Viral Single 'Drivers License' Are About to Take Over Your Life

1/13/2021 - Rita Ora Is Still Dead In the Pokemon Universe, Judging By This Katy Perry Song

1/13/2021 - Expel These People From Congress Already

1/13/2021 - The Grotesque Execution of Lisa Montgomery Blurs the Line Between What Is Legal and What Is Just

1/13/2021 - I Refuse To Believe Harry Styles Is a Homewrecker, Sorry Jason Sudeikis!

1/13/2021 - I Was Raised On the Lie of the Reluctant, Rural Insurrection

1/13/2021 - The CIA Has Released a CD-ROM (????) of Information On UFOs

1/12/2021 - Rep. Bonnie Watson Coleman Caught Covid Just Days After Being Exposed to Her Maskless Colleagues

1/12/2021 - Supreme Court Reinstates Rule Requiring Patients Receive Abortion Pill In-Person

1/12/2021 - Yes, I'm Blogging About Chuck Norris

1/12/2021 - DHS Agents Were Just Chilling During the Capitol Riot Because No One Asked Them for Help

1/12/2021 - Remember (Where) the Alamo (Is Located)

1/12/2021 - Here's a List of Five Condiments Smarter Than Chris Cillizza

1/12/2021 - CNN Reporter Breaks Down After Devastating Covid-19 Report

1/12/2021 - Has Prince Harry Emerged From His Flop Era With a Ponytail?

1/12/2021 - Anti-Abortion Activist Abby Johnson Had Quite the Adventure at the Capitol Riot

1/12/2021 - Everyone Relax, Martha Got the Vax

1/12/2021 - Please Shut Up About 'Healing' and 'Unity'

1/12/2021 - That's the Way the Pilar Cyst Bounces on Dr. Pimple Popper

1/12/2021 - When Will Queen Victoria's Reign of Terror End?

1/12/2021 - Who the Fuck Gave Rep. Pramila Jayapal Covid?

1/12/2021 - What's Going On With Kanye West and This TikTok Makeup Guru?

1/12/2021 - Lina Hidalgo, Who Expanded Voting Rights in Texas

1/12/2021 - Trump Supporters Planning 'Armed Protests' Across the Country Next Week

1/11/2021 - The Capitol Police Officer Who Took a Selfie with a Trump Supporter Has Been Suspended

1/11/2021 - Who Even Goes Here Still

1/11/2021 - No Thanks: Lana Has Decided to Comment on the Riots at the Capitol

1/11/2021 - Please Read This Incredible Op-Ed Full of Sentences by Susan Collins

1/11/2021 - The Long Bread Is Okay

1/11/2021 - Stop Letting This Cretin Speak to Gayle King

1/11/2021 - I'm Just a Used Condom Fluttering in the Wind on The Bachelor

1/11/2021 - Are Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green Locked in a Fierce Game of Revenge Vacations?

1/11/2021 - Politicians Like Andrew Yang Need to Do More Than Just Horrifiedly 'Imagine' the Childcare Crisis

1/11/2021 - Pope Allows Women to Serve Body of Christ But Priesthood Still Out of the Question

1/11/2021 - It's a Little Early, But RuPaul's Drag Race Already Seems to Have Found a Winner

1/11/2021 - Seoul's Advice for Pregnant Women: 'Don't Look Disheveled,' Prepare Food for Husbands 'Unaccustomed to Cooking'

1/11/2021 - Melania's Statement On the Capitol Siege Is, Predictably, Full Of Shit

1/11/2021 - Is Armie Hammer Really As Bad at Sexting As Your Third-to-Last Hookup? Maybe!

1/11/2021 - Apparently Some Officials Thought It Would Be Bad 'Optics' to Call the National Guard on Rioters

1/10/2021 - What the Hell Is Going on in This Lana Del Rey Instagram Comment?

1/10/2021 - A Very Pissed-Off Trump Has Some Big Plans for His Last Week in Office

1/10/2021 - The Sex and the City Reboot Is Happening, and Sadly There's Nothing Kim Cattrall or I Can Do About It

1/10/2021 - Area Social Network Fucked for the Time Being

1/10/2021 - Kamala Harris' Vogue Cover Has Got to Be One of THE Magazine Covers Released This Year

1/10/2021 - Queen! Olivia Wilde Maybe Got With Harry Styles Before She and Jason Sudeikis Were DONE Done

1/9/2021 - Saturday Night Social: Surprise! White Women Did It

1/9/2021 - Black Women and Latinas Continue to Bear the Brunt of the Post-Covid Economic Downturn

1/9/2021 - Are These 'Sources' Close to Karlie and Ivanka Just Karlie and Ivanka in Novelty Groucho Glasses?

1/8/2021 - Melania Skipped the Coup In Favor of the Important Task of Photographing Fancy Furniture

1/8/2021 - The Time You Dated Someone From Work

1/8/2021 - Opulence Abounds on Saweetie and Doja Cat's Excellent 'Best Friend'

1/8/2021 - When the Club Is Your Living Room

1/8/2021 - 'Possibly Deranged' Queens Squirrel Apologizes for Biting Neighbor: 'This Is Not Who I Am'

1/8/2021 - The Furniture Damaged in the Capitol Riot Will Almost Certainly Be Rebuilt By Incarcerated People For Pennies

1/8/2021 - Hip-Hop Comes to Utah: A Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Holiness Ranking

1/8/2021 - What's Up With Logan Paul's Feathery, Princess Diana-Inspired Mullet?

1/8/2021 - The Problem With Anointing the Celebrity Feminist

1/8/2021 - Does Stassi Schroeder Know Her Baby Shares a Name With an Alleged Sexual Harasser, Or?

1/8/2021 - The Bachelorette's Tayshia Adams and Zac Clark Discuss a More Diverse Bachelor Future

1/8/2021 - Drew Barrymore Makes People Try Food They Hate

1/8/2021 - Outside Agitators Charter Plane to Riot

1/8/2021 - Brave: All of the Massive Corporations That Suddenly Support Democracy

1/8/2021 - Thank You Ireland For CNN's Donie O'Sullivan

1/8/2021 - The Resistance Rescinds Its Invite to Karlie Kloss, Thanks to Tavi Gevinson

1/8/2021 - 'Gayle, Enough': SoHo Gargoyle Disrespects Gayle King, Is Arrested After Falsely Accusing Black Teen of Stealing Her Phone

1/8/2021 - Yet Another White Woman Has Been Outed For Pretending to Be a Person of Color

1/7/2021 - Betsy DeVos Latest Trump Minion to Pretend She Has Principles

1/7/2021 - Prosecutors Looking Into 'All Actors' Who Had a Role In the Riots at the Capitol—Including Trump

1/7/2021 - Shockingly, Another Anonymous Source Has an Update on the Rumored Kardashian-West Divorce

1/7/2021 - Georgia Republicans Vow That No More Fair Elections Will Take Place on Their Watch

1/7/2021 - This Is Most Certainly America

1/7/2021 - Welcome Back, Viennetta

1/7/2021 - Morning Joe This Is No Time For Corny Dweeb Shit

1/7/2021 - Then Came the Punks

1/7/2021 - Hilaria Baldwin Forced to Shop For Diapers Elsewhere After She Forgot the Word for Cucumber

1/7/2021 - Somewhat Unsurprisingly, Britney Spears's Shittiest Ex-Husband Is an Anti-Masker Who Also Attended the Trump Riot

1/7/2021 - West Virginia Politician Who Livestreamed Himself Storming the Capitol Is a Notorious Anti-Abortion Radical [UPDATED]

1/7/2021 - There Is No 'Peaceful Transition'

1/7/2021 - 'Brotherhood Is Healing': When Men's Self-Help Groups Collide With Covid Restrictions

1/7/2021 - Taylor Swift Dropped 2 New Bangers, Just in Time for the Coup

1/7/2021 - Karlie Kloss, Welcome to the Resistance

1/7/2021 - They Always Show Themselves

1/7/2021 - Oil Companies Aren't Super Interested in Drilling in Alaska's Arctic Refuge After All

1/6/2021 - What Do We Think Trump Will Do With His Time While He's Locked Out of Social Media?

1/6/2021 - The Rats Are Jumping Ship

1/6/2021 - What Time Is the 25th Amendment Happening?

1/6/2021 - Enough Is Enough Is Enough

1/6/2021 - Ivanka Learns That 'Patriot' and 'Domestic Terrorist' Are Not, In Fact, Synonyms

1/6/2021 - What Did These Fuckers Think Was Going to Happen

1/6/2021 - It's Apparently Very Easy to Riot in the Capitol When You're a Trump Supporter: Updating

1/6/2021 - The SAG Awards and the Grammys Are Fighting Over a Dinner Reservation

1/6/2021 - There's Much to Learn From How Badly 1 Girl 5 Gays Has Aged

1/6/2021 - Kylie Jenner, Queen of Capitalism, Released a Luxury Hand Sanitizer in the Middle of a Pandemic

1/6/2021 - Amber Heard Can Proceed With Lawsuit Alleging Johnny Depp Orchestrated a 'Smear Campaign' Against Her

1/6/2021 - Prince Charles's Life Waiting in the Wings

1/6/2021 - I'm Forced to Respect JoJo Siwa

1/6/2021 - Goodbye Kelly Loeffler, the Worst Woman in the World

1/5/2021 - Kenosha District Attorney Will Not Press Charges Against the Officer Who Shot Jacob Blake

1/5/2021 - Kimye is Allegedly No More

1/5/2021 - Nobody Puts Lt. Gov. Bae in a Corner

1/5/2021 - What's He Thinking?

1/5/2021 - The Girls Are STILL Fighting

1/5/2021 - We Need to Bring Back Clowning On Some Guy

1/5/2021 - Oh Darn, the Grammys Have Been Postponed

1/5/2021 - Bean Dad Is Sorry He Went Overboard on Bean Story, Assures Everyone Bean Child Is Safe and Eating Pistachios

1/5/2021 - Would You Buy Registered Sex Offender Anthony Weiner's Beautiful Kitchen Countertops?

1/5/2021 - Art Installation Begs the Question Will Men Finally Be Able to Identify a Clitoris on This Gigantic Vagina

1/5/2021 - Larsa Pippen Wore a Trash Bag and No Mask While Dining Out in Miami

1/5/2021 - Should I Buy This Luxury Lunchbox, or Is This My Pandemic Brain Speaking?

1/5/2021 - Down the Rabbit Hole With Justin Bieber's Glitzy New Megachurch

1/5/2021 - Dr. Pimple Popper and the Half-Head Removal

1/5/2021 - Man, What a Weenie

1/5/2021 - The First Black Bachelor Is Here, and Everyone Is Super Horny

1/5/2021 - Please Leave DJ Tanner Alone!

1/5/2021 - The Leader of the Proud Boys Has Been Arrested Ahead of Far-Right Protests

1/4/2021 - Gun-Loving Rep. Who Owns Gun-Themed Restaurant Would Like to Carry Gun on Capitol Hill

1/4/2021 - Whole Foods CEO Persists In Being Total Asshole

1/4/2021 - Tanya Roberts Is Still Alive, Contrary to What Her Rep Told Everyone 24 Hours Ago

1/4/2021 - At Age 36, Meghan McCain Has Finally Discovered Paid Family Leave

1/4/2021 - The RuPaul's Drag Race Queens Are Trapped in Purgatory, Just Like the Rest of Us

1/4/2021 - The Era of 'Practical' Bikinis Is Over

1/4/2021 - Invest in Yourself This Year

1/4/2021 - The Kardashians' Elaborate Aspen Vacation House Is Trying to Sell Me Something I Can't Afford

1/4/2021 - These Photos of Harry Styles and Olivia Wilde Are Forbidden (to Us)

1/4/2021 - Governor of OH, a State Leading the Nation in Child Poverty, More Interested in Burying Tissue Than Helping Children

1/4/2021 - Meet the Cast of the New Gossip Girl, Hot and Rich Like the Old Gossip Girl

1/4/2021 - I'd Rather Be Surfing With Adam Brody

1/4/2021 - Can We Just Impeach This Motherfucker Again

1/4/2021 - I Stand With Bean Daughter

1/4/2021 - Letitia James, the Attorney General Holding Corruption to Account

1/4/2021 - Don't Ask Blake Shelton to Write a Ruminative Song for the Current Dystopia, He's in Love

1/4/2021 - Oh Good, Billy Baldwin Wants to Talk About Hilaria Baldwin!

1/4/2021 - Officials Are Starting to Get Creative With the Bungled Vaccine Rollout

1/3/2021 - Introducing the New Squad

1/3/2021 - Very Sad That These College Grads Had to Defer Their Dreams of Destroying the Earth

1/3/2021 - Olivia Jade Would Like to See Some Chill Vibes Now That Her Mom Is Done Serving Time, K?

1/3/2021 - Nancy Pelosi Wins Re-election, Will Continue on as Speaker of the House

1/3/2021 - It's Donald Trump vs. Numbers Apparently

1/3/2021 - Is Zoë Kravitz Vagueposting About Her Just-Made-Public Divorce?

1/2/2021 - Saturday Night Social: This Bitch

1/2/2021 - Pelosi and McConnell Got Graffito Tagged

1/2/2021 - Busy Philipps Wants Her Gay Kid to Live Their Life 'However the Fuck You Want'

1/1/2021 - Your Most Magical New Year's Eve

1/1/2021 - Extremely Chill: Illinois Is Expunging 500,000 Marijuana Arrest Records

1/1/2021 - Sydney Battle's 'Brooklyn Mom' Was the Perfect Joke for a Year When Not Much Was Funny

1/1/2021 - Some Asshole Deliberately Destroyed Hundreds of Vaccine Doses

1/1/2021 - Callie Russell, the Woman You Want If You're Stuck in the Wilderness

1/1/2021 - What Even Is a Hit Anymore?

1/1/2021 - Justin Bieber Is Angling to Be the Next Mustachioed Pastor of Hillsong [UPDATE]

1/1/2021 - This Is What Childcare Could Look Like