Sienna Miller & Rhys Ifans To Wed; Kimora Knocked Up?

Illustration for article titled Sienna Miller  Rhys Ifans To Wed; Kimora Knocked Up?
  • Sienna Miller has reportedly finally agreed to marry Rhys Ifans — after he asked a third time. Summer wedding, you guys. With guests like Kate Moss and Keira Knightley! [Mirror]
  • Is Kimora Lee Simmons knocked up? Sources say she's got a bun in the oven, thanks to Djimon Hounsou. Now we're gonna be hearing about her "fabulosity" fetus for the next 9 months. [Page Six, People]
  • Someone placed a 911 call claiming Heather Locklear was suicidal; but when cops arrived Heather was fine, never requested medical assistance and did not place the call. WTF. [TMZ, TMZ]
  • Star Jones and Al Reynolds: It's over! Three and a half years after their sponsored wedding, Al has moved out and Star is planning to divorce him. Anyone surprised? [ONTD, MSNBC]
  • The girls from America's Next Top Model are accused of destroying the Tribeca loft they stayed in in New York. The floors are ruined, there's water damage in the bathroom and lipstick on the walls, says a source. Pretty can be ugly! [Page Six]
  • Heath Ledger's father says that even though Heath's will was filed before he met Michelle Williams, Michelle and Matilda "will be taken care of." [People]
  • A web site called George Clooney "gay, gay, gay." Says George: "No, I'm gay, gay. The third gay - that was pushing it." [People]
  • Clooney also commented on that feud with Fabio, admitting Fabio could probably beat him up. [UPI]
  • Gwyneth Paltrow got a C tattooed on her hip for her hubby Chris Martin. Or for Coldplay. Or for cookies. [Mirror]
  • The Sopranos movie? No. Seriously, no. It's just a rumor. [AP]
  • Q-Tip's new album features Barack Obama. Repeat: Q-Tip's new album features Barack Obama?!??!? [Page Six]
  • Helena Christensen and Josh Hartnett: Dunzo. [Gatecrasher]
  • It's someone's job to touch up the nail polish on Ivanka Trump's wax figure at Madame Tussaud's? Would you include that on your resume? [Gatecrasher]
  • Lindsay and Ali Lohan partied in the penthouse of their LL's NYC apartment building, but stayed sober. [Gatecrasher]
  • Apparently LL tells Ali to stay away from clubs. [UPI]
  • Blind item! "Which skinny-again chart topper has been making multiple bathroom visits with his male friend during late nights at hot spots like Hyde? Apparently it's not just the girls who like diet coke." [Gatecrasher]
  • Blind item! "Which famous braying crooner went down a line of Playmates and stunning models at a recent film festival, inquiring as to whether or not they'd sleep with him? There were no takers, and one of the models even laughed and called him 'short.'" [Rush & Molloy]
  • This video of Britney walking into a bar is kind of sad. See, she literally walks into a metal bar. [TMZ]
  • The obsessed fan who's been sending packages two to three times a week to Britney has included sexually explicit notes and a "battery-operated sex toy" in the mailings, gross. [UPI]
  • Courtney Love claims she is the victim of identity theft — that con aritsts used Kurt Cobain's name to buy a mansion in New Jersey. [UPI]
  • Except the LAPD says "It never happened." [TMZ]
  • Matt Damon's wife: Knocked up. This will be the third child for the family. [People]
  • Rihanna and Chris Brown: Singing each other's songs at a karaoke club in London. Sweet! [Mirror]
  • Jessica Simpson's trip to Kuwait to perform for the troops is costing $150,000 for the plane and $16,000 in hair and makeup. Who's picking up the tab? [MSNBC]
  • ABC soap One Life To Live has a storyline that may parallel Jamie Lynn Spears' life: A 16-year-old teenage character will have sex and maybe get knocked up. Juno, what hath ye wrought? [Reuters]
  • Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards have reached and agreement in their custody battle. The exes are making nice, awww. [E!]
  • Actress Samantha Morton was "close to death" after suffering a secret stroke two years ago. She took an unexplained break from making movies because she was learning to walk again. Jeez. She's fully recovered and gave birth to a second daughter in January. Be well! [Guardian]
  • Kathy Griffin became a ordained online so she could officiate in a New York wedding in which the non-religious bride and groom claim laughter is the major factor in their relationship. LOL and congrats! [USA Today]
  • Robbie Williams says he wants to study extraterrestrial life, and it's apparently not a joke. [UPI]
  • Sound Of Music star Julie Andrews has kept a secret for 58 years: She was the child of an affair. [Telegraph]
  • "I'm loath to say anything good about going to boarding school, which is one of the reasons why I'm not a believer in Harry Potter. Because I believe it fetishizes boarding school for children." — Tilda Swinton [Page Six]

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Is anyone really surprised that the ANTM girls are spoiled, dirty and disrespectful brats? I mean, when I went to college at 17 I was not the cleanest person in the world; my mom had help cleaning the house and doing laundry when my sister and I were younger, and I wasn't raised in exactly the most chore-centric house, but I damn well knew how to pick up after myself, do my dishes, and do my laundry, and I knew when that was expected of me — like when I was living on my own, with roommates. These girls are just ridiculously backwards, spoiled little brats who never had to do anything for themselves. And you can always tell the ones who were raised right, too, because they're the ones who are like "Hey, guys? Dishes? Dishes???" I feel bad for them.