Sarah Palin Calls Out Death Eaters To Deal With Fake Death Panels

Illustration for article titled Sarah Palin Calls Out Death Eaters To Deal With Fake Death Panels

Whoa. This "death panel" thing formerly-important-fifteen-minutes-of-fame-over-no-longer-elected-official Sarah Palin describes seems really scary. She even mentions that poor little pimped-out Trig might have gone before one of these death panels! It's a good thing then that death panels don't exist!


Can I just say I am really pissed about having to violate my own anti-Palin rules? As far as I am concerned, she's Lord Voldemort, aka She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. But apparently, she has the media all aflutter at more of her shenanigans, so into the bridge we go with the Dark Ex-Governor.

Basically, She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is so mad at Obama that she took it to the digital streets:

Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin claims President Barack Obama is making light of concerns over what she has called "death panels" determining or denying care in the Democratic health care proposal.

Palin makes the claim in a Facebook posting Wednesday evening.

CBS News elaborates:

In a widely quoted Facebook posting, former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin charged that federal bureaucrats would play God, ruling on whether ailing seniors or children with Down syndrome - such as Palin's son Trig - are worthy of health care. Palin called the proposal "downright evil."

Many news organizations - including The Associated Press - debunked Palin's claim. The provision that caused the uproar would authorize Medicare to pay doctors for voluntary counseling about end-of-life care.

"This is probably the most outrageous claim we've heard," Jonathan Cohn, senior editor of the New Republic and author of "Sick," said on CBS' "The Early Show" Thursday.

"There is a provision in the bill that they're moving through that if you want to write a living will, you want to talk to your doctor about it, you want to do it the right way … then Medicare will actually pay your doctor to sit down with you and do it. … That's all."

But Blumenauer says he is astounded that Palin and other critics have not tempered their bleak descriptions of the health care bill.

"It's deliberate at this point," Blumenauer said of Palin's failure to correct her Aug. 7 Facebook posting. "If she wasn't deliberately lying at the beginning, she is deliberately allowing a terrible falsehood to be spread with her name."


Foolish Muggle! The Dark Ex-Governor has no need for silly facts! Besides, her followers will quickly jump to do her bidding. Draco Malfoy, aka Iowa Senator Chuck Grassley, is doing his part to strike fear in the hearts of his township:

Appearing at a town hall in his home state of Iowa, Sen. Chuck Grassley told a crowd of more than 300 that they were correct to fear that the government would "pull the plug on grandma."

"There is some fear because in the House bill, there is counseling for end-of-life," Grassley said. "And from that standpoint, you have every right to fear. You shouldn't have counseling at the end of life. You ought to have counseling 20 years before you're going to die. You ought to plan these things out. And I don't have any problem with things like living wills. But they ought to be done within the family. We should not have a government program that determines if you're going to pull the plug on grandma."

Because obviously, nothing at all changes in the twenty years between having a reasonably healthy life and when your friends are all heading into the white light. But fuck it, we're invincible, we don't need no stinkin' counseling!


Anyway, You-Know-Who went for the heartstrings jugular, saying:

"The America I know and love is not one in which my parents or my baby with Down syndrome will have to stand in front of Obama's ‘death panel' so his bureaucrats can decide, based on a subjective judgment of their ‘level of productivity in society,' whether they are worthy of health care. Such a system is downright evil," Palin wrote last week.


Really? What provision was that again?

"The provision that President Obama refers to is Section 1233 of HR 3200, entitled ‘Advance Care Planning Consultation.' With all due respect, it's misleading for the president to describe this section as an entirely voluntary provision that simply increases the information offered to Medicare recipients," she continued.

"Section 1233 authorizes advanced care planning consultations for senior citizens on Medicare every five years, and more often ‘if there is a significant change in the health condition of the individual ... or upon admission to a skilled nursing facility, a long-term care facility... or a hospice program.'"


Huh? Dude, where's my death panel? We're all worked up over a consultation? Like the kind you get when you want a dermatologist to give you some options to clear your skin up? These are the big bad death panels?

Man, even the Dark Ex-Governor can't keep up the lie:

In an essay posted last night to her Facebook page, ex-AK Gov. Sarah Palin and her research staff responded last night to criticism from — well, she says President Obama, but it's actually criticism from sensible circles on the right and the left — that she misstated the facts when she wrote last Friday about "death panels" being given the power to decide whether her son Trig's life was valuable. [...]

Palin's opinion of the provision — and of Emanuel's influence — amounts to an argument that doctors ought to be careful and compassionate when they brief patients about end-of-life care. It does not justify the term "death panels," as the facts themselves don't justify the use of the term.

Palin's essay does not, in fact, mention, "death panels" this time.

For fuck's sake. Can someone please destroy her horcruxes now?

Palin says Obama brushes off reform concerns [AP]
Oregon Rep. Fights Palin, Gingrich Attacks [CBS News]
Grassley Endorses "Death Panel" Rumor: "You Have Every Right To Fear" [Huffington Post]
Sarah Palin doubles down on 'death panels' [Politico]
Sarah Palin Responds To "Death Panel" Criticism...With Footnotes![The Atlantic]

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Erin Gloria Ryan

She's so full of shit that the mass of the shit has collapsed into a singularity. The closer you get to the Palin Shit Singularity, the more the laws of physics, gravity, ethics, and logic bend, until they disappear at the center and not even wolves can escape.

(BTW Latoya, you've been doing a great job. Love your voice here.)