You know things are really bad in a relationship when you burp in the middle of a conversation and nobody laughs. Perhaps that was the precise moment when Sammi and Ronnie realized that their love affair had finally come to an end, after two-and-half seasons of constant bickering. Last night's episode was their swan song, except Sammi danced to it with some random guy at the club.
When the episode started, was anyone else confused about where exactly their relationship stood? They fight and make up so fucking often that the only thing that really stood out about last week was Ronnie's rectal bleeding. You know, they good ol' days, when Sammi and Ronnie still had something to smile about, like anal cream.
But, anyway, yeah, they were broken up at the start of this episode. Pauly D took Ronnie to the boardwalk, while Deena took Sammi to a bar where they two of them got day drunk. When they reconvened back at the house, Ronnie made some Ron Ron juice and had a brief spat with The Situation, which Sitch quickly defused by pretending to apologize.
Then Ronnie turned his anger back toward Sam. They did their usual routine, but just a little bit louder than normal, making it difficult for Pauly to clean the soles of his sneakers. (BTW, does anyone else get the vibe from him that he has serious OCD issues? It's weird that he brings home randoms so often given that he seems totally weirded out by germs and dirt.)
Eventually, The Situation needed to get his "backwards hat," so he went up to the room. Once Ronnie could actually see his audience, he took things to the next level, getting all caveman. He started throwing Sammi's shit around, tried to remove her bed from the room while she was on it, and complained about how she never cooked him dinner.
He left with the guys and went to the club and Sammi did the only thing she knew how: She put on a bra and a backless dress, and got a guy to dance with her at the club. Ronnie responded by going home and breaking her glasses, which was a somewhat sobering moment for any four-eyed viewers, who know the severity of such an act.
They got into another argument in which Ronnie called Sammie "bro" and she called him "dude." The next day she left the shore house, and Ronnie sobbed, because this time it was his heart, not his ass, that was broken.