ROYAL SCANDAL: Queen's Racehorse Caught Doping

Illustration for article titled ROYAL SCANDAL: Queens Racehorse Caught Doping

Yesterday, July 22, marked the 1 year anniversary of the birth of Prince George, son of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge and likely future king of England. Conveniently, this so called "first birthday" also happened to fall on the very same day that the Queen's prize race horse tested POSITIVE for DOPE. COINCIDENCE OR PERFECT DISTRACTION???

From the Guardian:

The racehorse owned by the Queen that won the Ascot Gold Cup last year has tested positive for morphine, Buckingham Palace announced on Tuesday night.

Estimate, a five-year-old mare trained by Sir Michael Stoute, came second in the same race this year, and is one of five horses understood to have recorded a positive test for the banned substance. The palace said they believed the morphine had come via consumption of a contaminated feed product.


"Contaminated feed product"? COOL PROPAGANDA, BRO. Next you're going to try play down the scandal by telling me that morphine is only against the rules on race days and not during training:

Morphine, which is used as a painkiller or sedative, is not banned for use in training to treat horses but is outlawed on racedays.

Because Estimate tested positive during the race (don't let the Guardian "newspaper" fool you), the horse will lose its title and be requested to give back the prize money of £80,625 — about $137,062 USD — that it's probably already spent on more drugs.

It seems optimistic to say that the Royal Family will pay for their mistakes — more than likely, they'll just throw Prince George another birthday in a year to continue this MASSIVE and DISGUSTING coverup — but at least there's one horse fan that will no longer be wearing her ESTIMATESTRONG bracelet. ME.


Image via the AP.

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I know headlines are supposed to be short, but I'm pretty sure the horse wasn't doping, I'm pretty sure some trainer was doping the horse. I've never known a horse to take drugs itself, but then I've never known any fancy royal horses. Or maybe the phrasing was a joke that fell flat for me, I dunno.