Rob Lowe Did a Very Bad Job of Convincing Jimmy Kimmel He Wasn't Behind That Job Listing

Rob Lowe went on Jimmy Kimmel Live! Wednesday night to promote whatever that show he’s currently on is, and the conversation eventually turned to that very funny job listing TMZ published earlier this week. Remember? It said his assistants should “never assume anything,” have a massage or Jacuzzi ready if needed, and be able to lift 25 pounds. While Lowe admits that he is looking for an assistant, he denied the listing was his.


“By the way, I haven’t seen this, but I’ve been hearing about it,” Lowe tells Kimmel. (Sure you haven’t.) He gives an emphatic, “Yeah!” after hearing the one about needing coffee, and once Kimmel finishes reading every ridiculous bullet point, adds, “It sounds pretty good, I’ve gotta be honest. I’m kind of liking the specifics that they’re asking for.”

“So you didn’t ask to be massaged or Jacuzzi,” Kimmel asks.

“There was no massage on there,” Lowe shouts back, as though more familiar with the listing than he originally let on. This is what they call a “tell” in poker. (Or at least that’s what I learned in Maverick.)

Kimmel returns to the list. “What did I just say? ‘If the client wants a Jacuzzi or a massage ordered for his arrival.’”

“Well it doesn’t say you’ve gotta massage me,” Lowe responds defensively. “Words matter.”

They sure do.

[E! Online]

Please watch this video of Travis Scott falling into a hole onstage and Drake proclaiming, “That’s turnt.” Drake then announced the show would be “free,” but no one quite knows if he’s actually going to give everyone who attended a refund.


[Fact Mag / BBC]

It’s funny that Taylor Swift cares about her song being on the radio. Like every day is the first half of That Thing You Do! to her.

  • Matthew McConaughey, shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. [Us Weekly]
  • Chrissy Teigen and Kim Kardashian are about to save literature. [Us Weekly]
  • Radar thinks Jennifer Lopez is “juggling” three boyfriends. [Radar Online]
  • Ben Higgins says reports he and Lauren split are “fake news.” [THG]
  • That Beyonce photo is now Instagram’s most-liked ever. Duh. [Daily Mail]
  • While we’re on the subject... [THL]

Staff Writer, Jezebel | Man



I LITERALLY IRL know one of Rob Lowe’s former assistants who lives here in Santa Barbara and I can guarantee none of that sounds true, she basically had nothing but good things to say and she insists that she was treated like family for the years she worked with him.

This woman is also the one who waxes me and she wouldn’t say for sure if she had waxed Rob’s asshole too but she heavily implied yes. There’s your real Rob Lowe assistant story.