Republicans Want You To Know That They Were Once Very, Very Poor

No modern American political campaign would be complete without the candidates insisting, repeatedly, that they come from Very Humble Backgrounds, and no one likes insisting that they used to be poor more than Republican politicians. Here’s a video montage of the 2012 GOP Presidential hopefuls’ ongoing war of economic one downsmanship, complete with a sad, sad violin soundtrack.

In order to even run for political office in this country, one must have an exceptional amount of money, education, hubris, and connections, or some combination thereof. However, in the last decade or so, someone somewhere decided that in order to be the President, you must be the Most Average Person in America. Middle class, middle part, middle white skin, with a medium-hot wife and a medium number of children, all of whom are average. So to appease this defensive mediocrisy that has somehow hijacked the American political process, candidates spend inordinate amounts of energy insisting that they’re super normal rather than solving problems.

And this, dear friends, is one of a thousand reasons why we’re completely fucked.