Today in wildly salacious celebrity gossip, Cara Delevingne is rumored to have hired a rabbit nanny for her pet bunny, Cecil.
According to reports:
"She never thought a little rabbit would be so much hard work," an insider divulged to British newspaper The Daily Star.
"At the moment she simply has too many commitments to give him the full attention he needs. But giving him away is not an option, so she decided an extra pair of hands was the way forward."
This is the best contextual use of "divulge" in the history of the English language. Anyway, there is no information about the nanny so you'll have to imagine his/her qualifications and past work experience for yourself.
Cara also went on a Twitter rant about the press in which she spelled "diarrhea" the fancy way; I think, given the nature of the aforementioned shocking divulgence, it's safe to assume she's talking about the bun story here (or, like, rumors she cheated on Michelle Rodriguez, idk, either/or):
Like the press, bunnies poop a lot. As the nanny knows well. [Belfast Telegraph]
Justin Bieber pleaded no contest to misdemeanor vandalism for unleashing a fiery hail of eggs upon his neighbor's house; he's been sentenced to two years probation, plus an $80,900 fine, plus five days community service, plus mandatory anger management. And a time-out, probably. [HuffPo]
In other Justin news, Justin Theroux spoke to details about some stuff and brooded on the cover. Most notably, he talked about his often speculated-upon relationship with Jennifer Aniston — he says the paparazzi that hound them are annoying, but "You have to center on what its core thing is, which is that you met someone you fell in love with. It's hard to explain. I just find myself wondering, What's the big f–king deal?"
Also, tabloids are fake, guys: "It's always based on fiction. You just kind of ignore it, but then you also become reluctant to say anything about the relationship. I could say everything's good, and then it's reflected back as JUSTIN THEROUX: EVERYTHING'S GOOD? That just creates this echo chamber, and it ricochets around the internet, it just gets wacky." Something to keep in mind next week, when there will probably be four separate JEN: PREGNANT & ALONE tabloid covers. [Details]
- Nicki Minaj is not going to keep doing her makeup the exact same way forever. Gird your loins for the coming cosmic change. [Bossip]
- Animal Planet is producing its first-ever scripted show....... a prequel to Moby Dick..... starring Martin Sheen (!!!!!). It's called "The Whale." Hopefully it just chronicles the adolescence of young Moby, who struggles as his undersea peers ruthlessly mock his name. [NY Daily News]
- Don't worry, it's only a rumor that Lindsay Lohan is missing rehearsals for the David Mamet play she's been cast in. [Gossip Cop]
- There are rumors swirling around the Internet that Gus Van Sant will direct a live-action version of Death Note! YES. [ONTD]
- Taylor Swift and Steven Spielberg had dinner together in the Hamptons after running into one another with their respective posses (Taylor's contained a skinny guy with a moustache). They talked for a long time, say onlookers. Also: " Spielberg donned a fedora as he was leaving." I feel like I was there. [Page Six]
- Here are some teaser images of Paris Hilton's new music video, which is inspired by "the magical feelings of new love." There is a unicorn involved, which shows that Paris truly understands what it is to be in the throes of fledgling passion. [Gossip Cop]
- On the subject of new love, Nicole Richie has come out as the dark mastermind behind whatever is happening with Cameron Diaz and the one from Good Charlotte whom Nicole is not married to. [Hello]