Report: Man Needs Beard

NEW YORK, NEW YORK – On Monday afternoon a group of writers at the website Jezebel were shocked to discover a popular television star was missing his beard.

Actor Kit Harington, known for playing Jon Snow on the hit HBO program Game of Thrones, hosted Saturday Night Live with a clean-shaven face. His beard and long hair, which he grew out to play the character, were quickly declared missing in action.

The loss of the beard is striking considering that Harington “needs the beard,” according to several Jezebel staff writers. “I usually don’t care for beards on white dudes but he is a white dude who needs a beard,” says Ashley Reese, staff writer. “Kitten needs a beard.”

“Kitten DOES need a beard,” Megan Reynolds, managing editor, replied.

“He looks wrong,” I said, before assigning myself this blog.

While working on Game of Thrones, Harington’s beard famously had its own contract and he was not allowed to cut it, however the actor was spotted briefly missing a beard in 2016. An investigation into what happened to Harington’s beard was not opened at the time, as it returned eventually to the actor’s face.

Jezebel writers quickly mobilized and began meticulously designing and printing thousands of fliers to locate the beard. Shortly before filing a missing beard report, Jezebel writers discovered that Harington willingly shaved the beard off. He told Entertainment Weekly in 2018 that he was looking forward to cutting his hair once completing the show. “I’d like to step away and enjoy the obscurity, cut my hair, make myself less recognizable as the character, and go do some other things with a completely new look and tone.”