Thirsty Thursday! Today's best comments are truly epic. Time to bust out the good stuff.

Best Comment of The Day, in response to How About A Little Fire, Scarecrow?: "Next up, a Cher-crow…" • Best Comment Of The Day, in response to Abusive Ex Holds Facebook Account Hostage: "Let this be a lesson: when you're in love, you share almost everything, but you should never share underwear or internet passwords." • Best Comment Of The Day, in response to We Seem To Have A Situation:

The implication that The Situation is going on vacation calls for celebration. I've got the sensation that this incarnation of ostentation is just a derivation of our culture's fascination with depredation instead of cogitation. Even the appellation "The Situation" is a permutation of our fixation on self-publication. Our adulation of this infestation of cultural exploitation, instead of giving compensation to education or exploration, shows our prioritization needs modulation. Damnation, what frustration! This isn't an allegation that The Situation needs deportation or flagellation; we just need a liberation from his propagation of ostentation. (Perhaps the corporation behind his creation needs investigation.) Our preoccupation with fame is a fulmination of our desperation for self-actualization, but GTL isn't an avocation, it's a retardation of the current generation. There should be a limitation on the association of "celebrity" with admiration.

• The director sits back in the darkened, mostly empty theater. He takes a drag from his cigarette and exhales loudly. The clickety-clack of the projector is the only sound for a moment, and then the director speaks.

Director: I like where this is going. This kid's got promise. Let's award this one the Special Mention For Unproduced Screenplay-Like Comment Of The Day. It's in response to On Men Who Are Jealous Of Call-Girls And Are Not Topher Grace. Now everyone get out of here, we've got a picture to make!

Reminder: If you see a great, funny, insightful, eloquent (or awful) comment, nominate it! Email the comment and the timestamp link to the left of the comment to Hortense at commenters@jezebel.com.

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