Reader Email Haiku: I'm Gonna Pray For Your Soul, Ok?

Illustration for article titled Reader Email Haiku: Im Gonna Pray For Your Soul, Ok?

The Jezebel inbox receives all sorts of interesting messages, from helpful tips to furious gibberish. Often, the missives strike us as poetic — in the chaos of the mailbag, we can find a sense of peace. As such, we have taken it upon ourselves to let some messages grow into the poetry they are meant to be. And we will do so by presenting them as Haikus. We can always count on The Whackadoo to come out in full force whenever we write about why, in almost all cases, it's stupid to not vaccinate your kids, and responses to Getting Measles Trendy Among Babies Whose Asshole Parents Didn't Vaccinate Them didn't disappoint. Spelling, punctuation, and spacing are [sic].

Date: Tue, May 22, 2012 at 11:27 am
Subject: Read your article

I was surprised by
the article.How much Does The

Industry Pay
You?And How Can You Sleep At
Night?Assholes Are The

Industries That Pro
fit From Deaths And In

juries Cause By
These Vaccines.Im Gonna Pray
For your Soul Ok.

Image via Rido/Shutterstock

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Violet Baudelaire

I never know what the appropriate response is when someone tells me they'll pray for me. I mean, I know it can be a very nice thought, but I'd really rather they didn't. It's one of those awkward situations where I really WANT to say something but know I probably really, really shouldn't