Do not fuck with Martha Stewart. Post-prison Martha will cut you. Or at least make your soufflé fall on purpose. If we were Rachael Ray, we'd start hiding out now. Ray, the annoyingly chirpy maker of 30-minute meals and head of her own Martha-esque media empire (Magazine? Check. Talk show? Check. Cook books? Check), has poached the publisher of Stewart's Everyday Food to assume that same title at her namesake mag, Everyday with Rachael Ray. They are both fools: Do. Not. Cross. Martha. We now have images of Martha going all witches from Macbeth, standing over a cauldron, casting spells on the both of them. Also, what was former Martha-er, soon to be Ray-er Anne Balaban thinking? Isn't going from working for Martha to working for Ray like going from working for Valentino corporate to stocking sweaters at Old Navy?

Martha, meanwhile, is sure to get the last laugh, because while Ray is clearly focused at present on solidfying her standing in print, Martha has moved on to conquering the Internet. Stewart is set to launch a site called Martha's Circle (which so sounds like a gang, right?) [Or a place to go and sew? — Ed], which will be a network of blogs on all things Martha-ish. In other words, many possible topics! The woman is capable of discussing potting soil, Hermes handbags, baby lions at the zoo, and how to create the perfect dry spice rub — all in the course of a single episode on her TV show. And eventually, Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia execs have suggested, Martha's presence on the Internet will evolve into a "MySpace-like social network for women." Just as we suspected, Martha shall soon rule the world! So maybe Rachael Ray stole a staffer. Martha rules the world.

Ray Raids Martha [NYP]
MSLO Draws Martha's Circle Blog, Lifestyle Site Network [MediaWeek]