Purported Pandemic Profiteer Kelly Loeffler Tests Positive for Covid-19

Has demon senatrix Kelly Loeffler ever heard of conditioner? Unclear! What is clear, however, is that she tested positive for covid-19 this weekend.

A spokesman for the Georgia Republican, who is currently campaigning in a runoff election to keep her seat in the U.S. Senate, told CNN that she took a rapid test and a PCR test on Friday morning ahead of some campaign events she had planned for that day. The rapid test result came back negative, so she carried on with her schedule, which included being up close and maskless with vice president Mike Pence and fellow Georgia senator Mike Perdue. Only in the evening did she receive her PCR test results, which came back positive.

“She has no symptoms and she will continue to follow CDC guidelines by quarantining until retesting is conclusive and an update will be provided at that time,” Loeffler spokesman Stephen Lawson told CNN.

Loeffler, who famously sold $20 million in stock after a closed-door Senate briefing on the coronavirus pandemic in January without doing much of anything to prepare her constituents for the nightmare to come in the weeks that followed, wasn’t the only high-profile Republican to test positive for covid in recent days. America’s most prominent failson, Donald Trump Jr., revealed that he, quote, “got the ‘rona” on Instagram Friday night, NPR reports.

Looking beyond these two demons, there have been more than 12 million covid cases in the U.S. since January, with nearly a quarter of them reported in November alone.