Project Runway: Guess Who's Going To Fashion Week!

Last night, the final four were revealed. But first, we had to watch the final challenge, which was to design an outfit inspired by New York City.

I’ll be blunt: I was outraged and personally offended that Gretchen felt “uninspired” by the challenge. She is so self-absorbed she can’t be inspired by one of the most amazing and glittery cities in the world? As a die-hard Manhattan-bred New Yorker, I was insulted and disgusted. She could have found a speakeasy and done something ’20s inspired. She could have gone to the UN and done some global chic thing. She could have gone to the botanical garden and done flower child. She could have gone inside the Museum of Modern Art, the Museum of Natural History, or the Metropolitan Museum of Art and been inspired by Wahrol, antelope or Rodin. Instead she walked around my neighborhood looking glum and made the most hideous effing skirt I have ever seen.

This whole thing is exacerbated by the fact that in season 1, Jay McCarroll made an absolutely gorgeous and now legendary dress inspired by the Chrysler building.

Anyway. It’s obvious Gretchen was burnt out or whatever, but blaming the challenge when you’re the problem is so childish. “I just want to make to wear clothes I want to wear” is something a five year old says. Not a woman trying to win a contest and go to fashion week. Look, if you just want to make clothes you want to wear, go do it, in your house, away from Nina, Heidi, Michael and Tim. And me! Christ.

Highlights and lowlights from the runway…

The judges loved Michael Costello‘s gown, which was inspired by the Statue of Liberty. How he got this far, we’ll never really know. He had no idea what fabric he’d used and this was not exactly an innovative design, let’s face it. But Michael Kors thought it was a “showstopper.” Heidi Klum loved the slit, of course. I never thought I would say this, but Michael C made the final four.

Mondo’s dress inspired by the Brooklyn Bridge was just okay, but he’d fallen asleep and whipped it up at the last minute. Creative genuises need to recharge! he’s in the final four, obviously.

My mom called me after the show to gush about Andy’s dress. She thought it was SO HOT. She likes a short hemline, because she came of age in the ’60s, when miniskirts and micro minis were just par for the course.

Mom especially liked the back of Andy’s dress and thought the cut-outs were like tree branches, since Andy’s inspiration was Central Park. Then she said: “I don’t watch Austin and Santini, they are boring.”

Andy is in the final four.

I continue to be offended, insulted and appalled at Gretchen’s outfit, since I live in New York, on the Lower East side, and would not touch any of it with someone else’s 10 foot pole. That leather jacket is NOT COOL. That dirty dishrag-colored blouse is NOT COOL. And that skirt, which my mother described as “so 1997,” is absolutely positively NOT COOL. Let’s pretend not to notice that it is lined in leopard print because I am on the verge of aneurysm.

Oh, did you notice that not one contestant named Gretchen as someone who deserves to go to fashion week? Ahem. [Update: Okay, April named Gretchen, I must have blocked that out.]

Here’s the thing about April: Her strength is her weakness. She has such a clear vision of what her style and aesthetic is, which is awesome. But she’s predictable, which is a little boring. That said, I thought what she made was waaaaaaay better than Gretchen’s. But the judges gave April a hard time. Michael Kors called it “numbing sameness” and “pregnant witch,” and Nina called it a “missed opportunity” to show something different. While we’re on the subject of missed opportunities, does anyone really thing that ANY of these dresses look like the contestants spent $500 on them? Someone could have done a Christian Siriano-style couture moment. Sigh.

In the end, it was Gretchen who stayed and April who was auf’d. Although, as we know, TEN designers actually showed during fashion week. Since the show technically already happened, back in September, you can see all the final collections here.

Also, you can look back on all of the season 8 posts — with runway shots and clips — by clicking here.