Pretty Bitches? Some Jessicas Are Also Fat, Hungry Hippos

Not all Jessicas are pretty bitches, as we previously stated—some can be big, fat sweeties. Meet Jessica, the world's only domesticated hippo. She washed ashore near a couple's South African home when she was only one day old and has lived with them for the past seven years as part of the family. Watch her do cute stuff like drink coffee, open doors, hang out in the kitchen with her "mom" and sleep under a pink blanket, snuggled up with her friend (one of the family dogs) at night.

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Jessica the Hippo [YouTube]

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andromache released the hogs of war

I have always wanted a pet hippo. They are the number one killer of tourists in Africa, plus they are adorable, so for years I have joked about having my very own hippo. These people are living my dream!!! Except of course part of my dream was to ride my hippo through the city streets on a killing rampage. Perhaps it's best that these people have a hippo and I don't...