Yesterday we decided to get "surprising" and poll our buddy list as to whether they believed in God. Now, that's not the sort of question that you ask our sort of buddy list without couching it in something totally smutty and gross, which is why we phrased the question, "Do you believe in God? And what about period sex?" Our inspiration was the August Cosmo, wherein we found a story that professes that periods and sex actually go together like um, Catholic school and plaid skirts.
Not only can climaxing relieve cramps, but the concentration of blood down below can trigger extra-intense orgasms for women.
Judging from our friends' anecdotes, period sex can be a almost religious experience! As one agnostic male put it: "People who get grossed out by period sex hate women, themselves, sex, happiness, and existence." We believe in all of those things! It's almost as good as believing in an afterlife.
One thing we learned from our resident pornography expert is that period sex is one sexual frontier that is not often fetishized in (non-Japanese) porn — probably because it feels, in the words of a friend's ex-boyfriend, "nice and gooey and warm" but looks, in the words of one of our ex-boyfriends, "like a crime scene." Of course, our friend Don (classic line: "Is your clitoris bleeding?") always used to say he liked the sight of blood. "It's like my dick killed something!" [Ugh. -Ed.] Still, as "gooey and warm" period sex lover points out, "no one likes uterine lining on the pubes." Indeed!
All told, the guys seemed more into the period sex than the ladies, which we found weird but then realized most of our guy buddies are the types of dudes who would, you know, hypothetically) fuck us, whereas most of our ladyfriends are just nice, tolerant, good-hearted, non-judgmental women. A fellow Jezebelle said she was "shy" about period sex, but that it was a huge turn-on when a guy was into it. "Like when he yanks out your tampon and just sticks it in a sock or something, like 'fuck it, we're doing this now'... that's hot," another woman elaborated. (Although, note to dudes: Taking it out with your teeth is comically gross enough to be a worthwhile story, but not something anyone wants to happen to her twice.)
Another blogger we know claimed her body went into a kind of weird shock when it "knew it was going to get laid" whereby the bleeding stopped. "Isn't that, like, just smart evolutionary normalness?" she asked. To which we said, ummmmm, yeah, if so, Darwin is probably trying to tell us something! Yet another girlblogger agreed with Cosmo: "I think period sex fuck yeah. more please! I am so horny on my period. And to be TOTALLY honest I like the down 'n' dirty aspect of it. And I think guys who can't get into it have body shame issues they need to work through or are gay." Yeah, whereas girls who can't get into it are either worried about the mattress or annoyed that they're being forced to do it in the shower!