Old Lady Shows Others Lost In The Wilderness How It's Done

Illustration for article titled Old Lady Shows Others Lost In The Wilderness How It's Done
  • Three cheers for 76-year old Ora Doris Anderson; the senior was thought to be dead after she went missing in the Oregonian mountains for two weeks but rescuers found her alive yesterday. Way to go, Grandma! [CNN]
  • A Daily Mail writer has her panties in a wad over usually demure women being fond of topless sunbathing. We were laying out topless yesterday not because it was a way of letting out our inner whore but because white boobs look stupid. Besides, Sienna Miller does it and she's a trendsetter. [Daily Mail]
  • Is breast-feeding the word of the day? Lactivists (heh) took their "nurse-out" national as protesters demonstrated at Applebee's restaurants in 30 states. It would be so much easier to just refuse to eat at Applebee's from here on out — their food is nasty anyway. [Kentucky.com]
  • The UN has been meeting with women's rights activists from Iran. Um, they give us oil right? Okay, who gives a shit then. [Ms.]
  • This news story is all in French but a reader translated it for us — seven French riot police are accused of raping prostitutes, blackmailing them into having sex for free. But seriously, they were just kidding! It was all a joke! That really is what one of the officers is using as his excuse. [France2.fr]
  • A British police chief says the legal drinking age should be raised to 21 because of the rising booze-fueled rape occurences. Um, yeah, it's really worked for us here in the States. Now, where did we put our pepper spray? [Daily Mail]
  • Side effects like muscle aches and hot flashes are causing women to stop taking cancer pills that prevent the disease from returning. Unfortunately, the possibility of death increases if the women don't take the pills for the recommended five years. [MSNBC]
  • The Senate voted to lift restrictions on family planning aid to overseas organizations that performs abortions (Bush is expected to veto it anyway). Will the FBI come running into our home office if we dare say we wish he had been an abortion? [Let's find out! - Ed.] [LA Times]

Share This Story

Get our `newsletter`



I used to be an avid topless tanner until I feel asleep in the sun and burned the spot between my breasts so badly that it was a mass of oozing blisters. Area still vaguely discoloured to this day. Definately haven't tanned since the incident, top on or topless - 3 years and counting.

If the old lady wants to talk about inappropriate breast displays, I'd love to introduce her to my sister-in-law. Clearly I'm as open to topless tanning as any girl could be, but my sister-in-law always gets up from her pool-side chaise and blithely skips over to the lunch table, proceeding to eat, guffaw, gesture and reach across the table as if her breasts weren't bouncing and bumping all over the place.

And we're all dressed. Because, you know, we're eating.