Okay, So He's A Misogynist. But He Can Make You Come!

Illustration for article titled Okay, So Hes A Misogynist. But He Can Make You Come!

The Assimilated Negro waxes lyrical on the "equalizing" power of the female orgasm today, and I'm alerting your attention to it because it's Friday, and shit's been kind of heavy today, and it incorporates the phrase "Lebron James of Labias."

It's the ultimate equalizer. If you can get them all flushed and winded and out of control and trembling and just ..... mmmmm. You feel like the Lebron James of labias who just went baseline and dunked on her dome, and you want to stand there and taunt, "Take that!! What say your years of feminist empowerment theory now, beeotch???"


Seriously, you should read the whole thing. It starts with a semi-misogynist rant about how he hates superficial small talk on dates and he doesn't even really think he likes women all that much but when he can make them get all ripply shuddery and crap he finds it really satisfying, and there might be a really bad attitude about gender roles in there that y'all Womyn's Studiers would find really offensive except I kind of think it makes no sense. Which is just the point.

Because like, isn't that just the thing about orgasms? You kind of have to not be thinking. At all. So yeah, blah blah blah TAN you blah blah blah hate women and blah blah blah hard out here for a pimp blah blah blah unresolved mother issues you hinted at in that Kanye post, we blah blah blah are toooooohhh hhhhhh-


Tally with you on the only thing that really matters: orgasms rule! TGIF.

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Har har har. Yes, making a girl come will make her like you more. In other news, kittens are adorable. It will not make her stay with you, or make you smarter, more successful, better-looking, more charming, less of an asshole, etc. It means you did a job well. Once.

Oh and agree with the commenter there — you think you're LeBron James because you made her come once? It's not a good night until I'm at least in the three to five zone.

And that's not just because my man knows what he's doing, it's because I know what I'm doing. As the Second Wave feminists said, women are responsible for their own orgasms. That means we can at least take partial credit for them too.