Not Getting Any? It's Your Own Damn Fault

Illustration for article titled Not Getting Any? Its Your Own Damn Fault

Are you having sex? Like, on a regular basis? CNN claims that women today have less time for sex than their 1950s counterparts. And if it's not a lack of time keeping you from bumping uglies, it's something else, but it's probably your fault. Writes Leslie Goldman, "It's harder to initiate sex if your spouse is hiding behind a newspaper or glued to the TV or if your hands are busy exploring the Web rather than his body." Hey, how come the dude in the picture doesn't just pry the laptop right out of the woman's hands and bang her? Why does the woman bear all the responsibility? Other reasons you're not having sex: You're on libido-killing contraceptives, you don't like your body, you're perimenopausal, you're depressed. (And if you're not depressed, you will be when you discover it's all your fault you're not getting laid.) But there's hope, courtesy of The Independent: A Valentine's Day list of aphrodisiacs to "boost your sex drive," ranging from oysters to female testosterone patches and uh, counseling.

Speaking of counseling, a 27-year-old woman quoted in a recently re-published Psychology Today article says she's just not that into it (after having a baby that is): "After I gave birth to my daughter my sex drive decreased... I don't like to cuddle and I barely like to kiss... Do I need therapy?" Instead of just saying, "Nah, give it some time," Nando Pelusi, Ph. D. offers this: "You may be fatigued." Who the hell isn't? But here's question: How come women are always painted as reluctant delicate flowers not interested in sex? And why do they need "fixing" if this is the case? (P.S. According to CNN, 40 million Americans are in a marriage where sex occurs less than 10 times a year.)

Surprising Reasons You're Not Having Sex [CNN]

How To Boost Your Sex Drive [Independent]

Earlier: Wait, You're Too Tired?

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I have friends who formed a baby-sitting co-op, for those of us without reliable family babysitters. Get a trustworthy group of maybe 4 parents, and every week the babysitting responsibilities for EVERYONE'S ankebiters gets passed to a different couple. That way you have 3 date nights before getting a massivo babysitting party at your place.