Norwegian TV Station to Air Five Straight Hours of Competitive Knitting

Ah, Norway! Land of my people! A Norwegian television station has announced that they plan to broadcast the world knitting record for the fastest time from “sheep to actual finished sweater”—earmarking a full five contiguous hours for the purpose. That’s five hours of shearing, spinning, and knitting (plus four hours of fleece-themed knitting pre-show). On TV.

I grew up eating a bastardized Norwegian dish that my mom called “milk mush,” which is essentially just hot flour soup, so in terms of entertainment this sounds about right:

“The NRK network says the Nov. 1 broadcast will be preceded by a four-hour documentary on how the wool off a sheep’s back turns into a sweater,” according to the Associated Press. “NRK producer Rune Moeklebust said Friday that ‘it’s kind of ordinary TV but very slow, although they’ll be knitting as fast as they can.’”

They’ve dedicated five whole hours to the event to see if the individuals can beat the previous record held by Australia of 4 hours and 51 minutes of non-stop knitting. Originally, I was thinking grandmothers around the world must have beat this record 10 times over since the beginning of knitting, but the actual record involves the fastest time between the sheep to the actual finished sweater.

OH GOD NORWAY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. (Full disclosure: I would totally watch this. Drink every time the fleecy lamb craps on the floor!)