Somebody bought a mansion outside a gated community and opened up a school/modeling agency for exotic dancers. And he might’ve gotten away with it, authorities say, except the place was just too goddamn loud. I’ll give you three guesses where, but you’ll only need one.

That’s according to the Tampa Tribune. Noise complaints led to the discovery of “Pharaoh’s Daughters,” which, according to its website, “provides coaching and ongoing employment to promising young strippers and exotic dancers for work in prestigious gentlemen’s clubs.” I’m sure everything about this operation was totally above-board, but the authorities say it was a glaring zoning violation:

“If they had flown under the radar, they’d still be in business,” said Hillsborough sheriff’s Deputy Phil Acaba, who has investigated the events at 18520 Ramblewood Road. “The noise was the issue that brought their downfall.”

“It’s a priority of my office that we work with Code Enforcement and the sheriff’s office so we can return peace and order to their neighborhood,” Beckner said. “That kind of establishment has no business being in a residential neighborhood anywhere.”

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They’ve been slapped with five violations and one manager got a misdemeanor noise charge, too.

Twist: The man who owned the property was not, in fact, a Florida man. He’s Canadian!

The mansion is owned by Pink Tati LLC, but the principal owner is Canadian millionaire Gordon Lownds. In an interview Monday, Lownds said he has ceased all commercial activity at the 12,000-square-foot house, shutting down its modeling school for exotic dancers.

“We are aware of what we are allowed to do and not do,” Lownds said. “We are conforming with all the zoning requirements.”

Lownds bought the mansion in April 2013 for $2 million. He said he and some partners planned to film a reality show there about the day-to-day lives of strippers.

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He redid the house with “lush, Egyptian-themed decor” and dubbed it “Pharaoh’s Palace,” attempting to rent it out to music video producers, for instance. But they also opened Pharaoh’s Daughters and—big mistake—threw events, as well. And not quiet cocktail hours. One neighbor says he was finally pushed to protest when they hosted a “Midsummer Night Wet Dream” party featuring a porn star. (Yeah, and it’s Midsummer Night’S Dream, possessive, you dorks.) Finally the local Code Enforcement Board felt they had enough evidence of zoning violations to make their move.

And there you have it, a cautionary house-party tale.


Contact the author at kelly@jezebel.com.