New Anti-Sexting App Doomed To Failure

Kids today sure do love texting! But a new app could force them to keep it clean — or just get creative.

According to Katherine Rosman of the Wall Street Journal, “the average 13- to 17-year-old sends and receives 3,339 texts a month — more than 100 per day.” This is the most convincing evidence yet that I am now old — I can no more imagine sending 100 texts a day than I can, say, liking Justin Bieber. Or, for that matter, sexting. Despite Cosmo’s insistence that I “entice him” with “sexy texts,” I’ve never really gotten the hang of this supposed seduction method (one time I tried it, and my then-boyfriend thought I was cursing at him). Now sexting could get difficult for teenagers too — according to the NY Post, Apple has patented an app that would keep teens from sending sexy messages.

If a kid tries to type something racy, the app will apparently “either require the user to replace the unauthorized text or may automatically delete the text or the entire communication.” It’s not immediately clear whether only certain words will be blocked, but I bet teens could get around the censorship by sending such subtle missives as “I’ll pole dance 4 you. U bring the pole…” or “Don’t do much @ the gym…save energy for L8R” (both Cosmo recommendations, natch). Whatever the case, the app seems ripe for “Tyson Homosexual”-style screwups. And who says teens are the only ones who need to be kept from sexting? I’d recommend this app for district attorneys.