Here are some spooky through-the-bushes pictures of Nat Port’s wedding to Benjamin Human Centipede: Full Sequence, which was vegan and Jewish and French and on the Big Sur coast and sounds nice, although I’m not sure about that dress. They had macarons instead of cake, and guests (including Diane Sawyer, Mike Nichols, Ivanka Trump, Macaulay Culkin and Rashida Jones) went home with packets of wildflower seeds reading “Merci.” Aite. [Daily Mail, People]
Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world.
It is a little-known fact that the rough beast slouching towards Bethlehem to be born to which poet William Butler Yeats refers in his poem “The Second Coming” is Jersey Shore star Pauly Delvecchio, who makes $11 million a year. [NYDN]
After spending three years identified publicly as bisexual, “Grace Kelly” singer Mika as come out as gay and said that it will have an important effect on his upcoming album, Origin of Love: “If you ask me am I gay, I say yeah. Are these songs about my relationship with a man? I say yeah. And it’s only through my music that I’ve found the strength to come to terms with my sexuality beyond the context of just my lyrics. This is my real life.” [Daily Mail]
After having alienated the British people thanks to a dig about Prince William‘s hair, The Beebs, he of the infamous Voice So High That It Sounds Like a Ringtone™, has now pissed off (of all people) the
I’m actually part Indian. I think Inuit or something? I’m enough percent that in Canada, I can get free gas.
However, Beeb0 is not “enough percent Indian” for that to slide past the Congress of Aboriginal Peoples, who said they beliebed that:
These kinds of remarks are another example of what Aboriginal peoples in Canada struggle with every day. It promotes the misconception that we are somehow getting a free ride. This simply is not the case and we are concerned that many people may believe what he said.
The group then admitted that he was “a young man and unaware of the facts” and didn’t think he should be beaten up by the public over these comments, even offering to help him trace his native roots.
Also, DO YOU WANT TO BE JUSTIN BIEBER’S BACKUP DANCER LET US PRACTICE TOGETHER I LEARNED HOW TO DO THE CUPID SHUFFLE AT A WEDDING RECENTLY. [MTV News]
At Roseanne Barr’s Comedy Central roast, Jane Lynch had a message for Chik-fil-A.
- Kim Kardashian Tweeted a bikini picture. [Instagram]
- Rob Kardashian is heading to law school. [Radar]
- Lady Gaga celebrated her one-year anniversary with Taylor Kinney, oysters and caviar. Sounds fucking AWFUL. [Page Six]
- Oh: and here they are skinny-dipping. [Daily Mail]
- Ice-T and Coco (“in a revealing bathing suit from her own line, Licious”) at Foxwoods! Ever thine, ever mine, ever ours. [Page Six]
- Here is a very important picture of Taylor Swift’s cat, kind of hilariously named Meredith, watching the Olympics. [People]
- “Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson were planning to have a baby before Sandersgate 2012!!” chirped someone who is probably a liar. [FemaleFirst.co.uk]
- Chris Martin’s kids give him critical opinions of Coldplay songs: “Yes, this hook-y, mid-tempo, sentimental jam is a total departure for you, and why the fuck did you name me Apple?” [Capital FM]
- There’s an arrest warrant out for Jennifer Lopez’s ex-husband Ojani Noa, so like, if you see him… [Entertainment Tonight]
- Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby has been pushed back a year. [USA Today]
- Paris Hilton lay on a beach in Corsica with a dude who looks just like all the other dudes she’s dated. [Daily Mail]
- Pamela Anderson will not be having any sexual intercourse during her stint on Dancing With The Stars. That adds up to 0.00 intercourses. [News.com.au]
- President Obama‘s favorite part of The Dark Knight Rises was when Anne Hathaway. End of sentence. [Sugarscape]
- Brad Pitt got Maddox a motorbike for his eleventh birthday. [The Sun]
- Miley Cyrus went short and blonde. [People]
- Kelly Rowland wants you to know that no, Destiny’s Child will not fucking reunite, thanks. [Express]
- Katy Perry wants to get more acting experience. Dating John Mayer will be great for that because once it ends she’s gonna want to act like it never happened. [Timeslive.co.za]
- This just in: Composer, conductor and EGOT winner Marvin Hamlisch has died. [The Wrap]