As if the city hadn't already played host to enough monumental occasions involving, uh, "wang" this week, MINNEAPOLIS ALREADY HAS "SIMPLY VERA" FOR KOHLS, according to Minneapolis/St. Paul magazine style blogger (and Replacements fan!) Sara Glassman. That's right. Now. Not September 9th. And girlfriend says get thee to Kohl's ASAP to snatch the shit up because it's really good and OMGoutinstoresalreadysoifyouwaittilltheactualrelasedateyou'llbeSCREWED. Of course. So we did a little investigating ourselves. Do you have to make a pilgrimage to a certain historically lewd airport to get some early? Or is this just a special treat for the executives at Minneapolis-based Kohl's archenemy Target Corp.?
First we sent our beloved mom to the Kohl's store by our childhood home of Marietta, GA. According to the good folk there, the shipment has arrived already, but they have been instructed not to put the merchandise out until the first week of September. Ok, Atlantans — that could mean as soon as Saturday! Prepare yourselves!
Next we called the Kohl's geographically closest to us, in Jersey City. Merchandise will be out for sale on September 4th there. And we're worried what the psychotic New Yorkers are going to do the poor Jerseyites during what is sure to be a Wang-inspired rumble.
Medford, MA: Hometown of our alma mater! Says the employee in the missus department there, "I went to the shareholders meeting in Milwaukee earlier this year and they said sometime in the fall. That's all I know. But it looks like a really nice line! I don't have any more information than that, though." Disappointing. (AKA Typical Medford.) But nice that the employee owns actual shares in something!
The woman with whom we spoke at the Birmingham, Alabama store chucked with resignation when we spoke with her. It sounds like we are the gajllionith call she's gotten about this: "No, it's not in yet — but any day now. We're expecting it on next truck in, hopefully," she told us.
And lastly the Milwaukee, WI store - the very birthplace of Kohl's! They'll have it Tuesday. Definitely Tuesday. So if it's all gone in Minnesota already, Midwestern peeps, just drive across the border.
So there you have it, friends. Vera Wang: A continued enigma. That (excellent and amazing looking) shit could be anywhere, at any time. The search is on!