Men Have Discovered 'Bro-tox'

Somebody put the all of the Real Housewives of the world on high alert: They might want to start stocking up on vials of Botox right now and booking those dermatologist appointments an extra three months in advance, because dudes have discovered cosmetic procedures and they are loving it.

Men are very late to this form of youth-preservation and so as not to upset their delicate masculine sensibilities, they have renamed it “Bro-tox” because god forbid we stop unnecessarily gendering shit that has nothing to do with gender in the first place.

Josh Dean at GQ dove into the world of “Bro-tox” and this surge of men opting for cosmetic procedures. Dean notes that: “We are only in the very early days of the Era of Unapologetic Male Beauty,” which is weird because I thought that started back when P Diddy admitted his love for manicures.

He spoke with Eidelman, a dermatologist in New York specializing in non-invasive procedures about what exactly men are looking for in their cosmetic enhancements.

The techniques men are trying span a gamut, from eyebrow sculpting to teeth whitening to high-tech procedures that’ll either grow hair where it’s wanted or laser-blast it away from where it’s not. Indeed, if Eidelman’s own busy office is any indication, the sort of procedure that once might have sounded outlandish for many guys is now beginning to sound more like routine upkeep. “What I’m seeing more now is, like, a straight stockbroker who just wants to look good,” Eidelman tells me. “These people would never have come in before. They’re taking care of their bodies, and they know it’s not a big deal.”

In addition to this hypothetical stockbroker, Dean suggests that some men may be turning to “Bro-tox” to keep up with their wives who are already undergoing these types of procedures.

As it seems, male use of Botox has increased by 310 percent since 2000, so this is definitely a thing. While most men still don’t face a fraction of the pressure put on women to stop aging once they hit age 33, I guess there is some comfort in knowing that many men have similar hang-ups about their appearances and bodies as women.

So, welcome, gentlemen. Let us all come together under the roof of the dermotologist’s waiting room in the name of youth and and healthy dose of vanity. Is this what equality looks like?