I am fairly certain Chris Waitt is an incorrigible douchebag but I will pay to see his movie anyway because he has done something horrendously cynical and at once infuriatingly smart/totally obvious, which is to say: he went back and interviewed all his ex-girlfriends to ask why they kept dumping him and made it into a movie called A Complete History Of My Sexual Failures— trailer after the jump — which is out next week in… London. (But you can, um, upload a Facebook widget at the website!) Anyway, the point is, it seems all Chris's girlfriends dumped him for the same reason, because at some point everyone wearies of waiting around for the satisfaction of being dumped, and when you get to that point you're generally too busy trying to decide whether to target your contempt at yourself/him to even think to articulate any specific grievances for the sake of hearing yourself talk. So Chris goes back to hear what they would have said. (And also get spanked by a dominatrix.) Most of them blocked it out obviously! "All I remember is…you were a jerk," says this one, adding semi-poignantly:

I was naive and I was romantic…and I think those are good things, to be naive and romantic and still believe in…love or something.

Yeah, of course, fuck that. I can't hang out with those people. Amusingly, one apparently will only submit to an interview if he digitally alters her voice, and then it turns out he has impotence problems, etc. etc. Here is the trailer.

A Complete History Of My Sexual Failures [Official Movie Site]

Sundance Review: A Complete History Of My Sexual Failures [Variety]