Mall Madness Was Capitalism in a Board Game

It’s almost summertime, which means it’s a good time to take up some indoor activities while your friends melt on the sidewalk in the flaming heat. This is of the utmost importance here at Jezebel, a blog comprised almost entirely of vampires for whom sun exposure could be deadly.

Luckily, many of the board games marketed to girls are just the competitive versions of real life bullshit, like calling your crush on the phone and doing chores before a party, so you may never have to go outside again!

In anticipation of any incoming heatwaves, we decided to brush up on one of our favorite childhood board games, Mall Madness. Watch the video to see if it still succeeds in making a capitalist hellscape seem fun.