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Lydia Hearst: "I Am All Business. I Am All Work"

Illustration for article titled Lydia Hearst: I Am All Business. I Am All Work

Ugh, Lydia Hearst. She is a 23-year-old daughter of Patty Hearst, meaning her real last name is "Shaw," and she has had a cartoonishly charmed life too cartoonish to even joke about, because it's not like she actually does anything, except model and socialize and write a biweekly page of gibberish for Page Six Magazine about which she just said:

"I sit down and I write what I'm thinking and what I feel—it happens all at once, I never stop writing. Probably when I go home tonight, I'm going to open my computer and just start typing... I always envision myself being a Hemingway type—sitting in a dark corner with my glass of, I guess it would be, my glass of tequila and lime juice— that's how I do it."


Okay, so why why why did I just fill my brain with all three pages of Lydia Hearst data points such as ... she collects Barbies...dislikes champagne...thinks exercise constitutes work...gets Iran and Cuba mixed up...endorses Colbert for president...wears size six shoes...calls her group of friends "The 2.0."???

Because there is a lesson we can learn from Lydia Hearst's nauseating brand of idiocy, and it's much more mass-market than "Models should probably all have their voice boxes removed."


It's that if you find yourself ever talking about how you are "different" like that is a good thing, you are definitely actually just a narcissist. Also, cocaine is the quickest way to make everyone hate you.

Lydia Unleashed (as in, your puke will become...) [New York Observer]

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Jenna Sauers

I'm thoroughly ashamed to share a NY agency with her. Factory 2.0. Sigh.

And she's not tall enough to be a model — she's 5'7".