Lucky Magazine's Sexy, Glamorous "Caption Dementia"

Illustration for article titled iLucky/i Magazines Sexy, Glamorous Caption Dementia

Do we have something to do with Lucky editor Kim France's nightmares? A few times, we have pointed out the severe redundancy in the captions in Lucky. (I mean, really, how many times can you use the word "glamorous" in one issue? Twelve, according to our tallies. It's like they're the Kimora Lee Simmons of Conde Nast!) So in the new March issue, Kim actually acknowledges her staff's "caption dementia" and devotes her entire Editor's Letter describing how she wakes up at 2 A.M. hoping to hit the jackpot with a new word. She adds that the editorial staff suffers to find the right word for its dear readers: "We suffer, we really suffer, so you can know which woven wedge is especially walkable." (Yay, alliteration!) And she's even giving away $1,000 to the reader who can actually do a better job "bringing the freshest language" to the magazine's four-page shoe guide. After the jump, we see if things have really changed over at Lucky in the past four months or if they still sound like our favorite broken record.


It appears that the extra-thick Spring Fashion issue is, well, extra-repetitive. Editors were so at a loss for words that they even managed to let a few banned words slip by ("adorable" on page 23 and 66). Our scientific historical data below shows that the same offenders keep popping up and that not much has changed.


March 2008
Times Used: 13
Definition- adjective - full of glamour; charmingly or fascinatingly attractive, especially in a mysterious or magical way.
Used to describe: silk pants (p. 272); a store (p. 32 ); a cocktail ring (p. 34 ); a boat shoe (p. 92 ); and 9 other things.

Word : "Sexy"
Times Used: 15
Definition - adjective - excitingly appealing.
Used to describe: a musk and mimosa fragrance (p. 64 ); the color hot pink (p. 86 ); mini tea dresses (p. 95 ); a shoe (p. 189 ); and 14 other things.

Word: "Gorgeous"
Times Used: 18
Definition - adjective - splendid or sumptuous in appearance, coloring.
Used to describe: makeup ( p. 170), a woman (p. 242 ); wooden heeled shoes (p. 192); a motorcycle jacket (p. 120 ); and 14 other things.

Word: "Pretty"
Times Used: 13
Definition - adjective - pleasing or attractive to the eye, as by delicacy or gracefulness.
Used to describe: a dress (p. 112 ); spring makeup (p. 177 ); a compass pendant (p. 92 ); a tortoiseshell toothbrush (p. 185 ); and 9 other things.


The Lucky Backlist:
February 2008: Most Overused Words: "Beautiful": 10 times; "Glamorous": 12 times; "Gorgeous": 12 times; "Perfect": 13 times.
January 2008: Most Overused Words: "Elegant" : 8 times; "Gorgeous": 9 times; "Sophisticated": 12 times; "Glamorous": 12 times.
December 2007: Most Overused Words: "Pretty": 13 times; "Sexy": 13 times; "Glamorous": 12 times; Serious: 7 times.

The Lucky Walk-In-Our-Shoes Caption Writing Contest [Lucky]

Earlier: Oscar Fashion Critic Kimora Lee Simmons Has A Very Limited Vocabulary
Lucky Magazine's Ultra-Elegant And Sophisticated One-Track Mind
Lucky Magazine's Pretty, Sexy, Seriously One-Track Mind
Lucky Magazine's Subtle, Feminine, Chic, Annoyingly One-Track Mind

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Too bad fashion writers make $1,000 times ten.


I wrote fashion at Vogue for a bit —just a bit. Lemme try:

Glamourous: Dripping with it, shilled, worthwhile, does-this-have-a-price-tag?, trademark, classical, sprinkled, parkly, gold standard, dusted, minted, exciting, gaze-worthy, Champagne and strawberries, the got.

Sexy: lip-licking, tingly, a dress that would do it if it could, tickling, fantorgansmic, homecoming, luring, Johnson bait, want-it shoes, gaming, stalker bait, arresting (literally), thrustingly, achingly, your-place -or-mine must have, tantalizing, Bonermaker, does-it-have-a price-tag? appeal, ridden hard and put back wet and heaving.

Gorgeous: Lockjaw look, stammer-worthy, causing staregate, Lovingitly, stun gun victimization, taseresque,mute-maker, unaffordable, wonderfultonight, whatsinyourwalletwally?, you-can'tafford-meesque.

Pretty: Frilled, not filled, Personality-plus, daisy to a rose, pleasingly porny, missionaryesque, brown-paper package toied up with string, non-threatening, leather-n-lace ish, eye sweet, ruffled and restrained,second-look worthy, blossomish, too nice to say no.

See why I was fired from Vogue after a month?