To all my Britsh belles, I apologize right now for the portrait of the UK the following images are about to paint. We know, of course, that English outfits are not exclusively fug and frump, but the awful thing is that someone looking at the schmatte from the "Pride Of Britain Awards" at London's Television Centre would be forgiven for thinking so. Not that I really think the assembled crowd, huddled under Union Jack umbrellas, represents the pride of any Brit but a reality-TV producer, but still. The Okay, Bad, Ugly, after this proud jump!

The Okay:

This looks like possibly the least pleasant weather in which to be standing in an insubstantial gown. At least Trisha Goddard 's tangerine is a cheerful note.

Seriously, doesn't it look like Kelly Holmes is fighting 60 mph winds? I think the late-50s silhouette works. Although it should be noted that this silhouette would have been the domain of the demimondaine in the late 50s, no? Or at least the less than respectable.


See, at first I saw Carol Vorderman's sleeves and thought, oh, Ugly. But what a difference a few dozen images makes! Now I know how a teacher with a classroom filled with lazy dullards must feel.
The Bad:


Alex Curran channels ice-dancin' grandma to perfection!

Oy. Melanie Sykes' number is a frumpapalooza.


I believe I've made it clear that using a muffin tin liner as a tucker does not increase a dress's modesty. Kelly Brook didn't heed this.

Not much to say about Amanda Holden's outfit save that it's kind of crummy-looking.
The Ugly:


Louisa Lytton's is like the emcee from Cabaret "in Lolita."

Images via Getty