Lisa Ling Expresses Fear, Hope For Sister's Release

Illustration for article titled Lisa Ling Expresses Fear, Hope For Sister's Release

"The ridiculous optimist in me was hoping they would show leniency and just let the girls go. That obviously wasn't the case. I still can't believe it's going on." — Lisa Ling, on sister Laura's imprisonment in North Korea. [Sactown]

DISCUSSION

lolaquinn-is-full-of-beans-old
LolaQuinn is full of beans

I like to imagine that what Bill Clinton is REALLY doing in Korea is donning a mask, cape, tights, and thigh-highs; using toilet plungers to scale the wall of their prison; and then breaking them out of the clink to whisk them away on his magical Pegasus. On their way out he'll point his laser finger at Kim Jong Il, causing his pants to fall down in front of the nation. This will cause so much national shame that Kim Jong Il will have to be exiled, and everyone will be freed.

Oh, also, there will be a national party to celebrate the return of the journalists. Everyone will get cake, and no one will have to go to work that day.