Illustration for article titled Lipstick Jungle: What Does Yours Say About iYou/i, Ladies?

Hey! Remember on Mad Men, in the "Babylon" episode in season 1 when they're doing the lipstick campaign and they watch all the secretaries try on the lipstick through the two-way mirror? Well, Jezebelle Katie was kind enough to send us in this "Lipstick Personality Profile" group activity from the Pi Beta Phi sorority that tells you about yourself based on the way your lipstick looks over time. Obviously, I had to take it.(Full answers are given below.) I surveyed the lipstick shape options and I quickly determined that I belonged to a ninth category: broken or lost. I've never really managed to keep a lipstick around long enough to determine its natural erosion processes and I tend to wear more stains and glosses, anyway. I had a vague memory of one I had in high school, though, for like three years (which, yes, is disgusting, but it seemed really expensive at the time and it was my "special occasion" lipstick, even though in retrospect the color was really unflattering and I got a bunch of sand or something in it.) It seemed to me that had been kind of rounded - although, again, it melted a few times, so it's hard to say. Score! "Rounded" meant I was an easy-going, steady, even-tempered peacemaker, pleasant to be around, generous and likeable! Accurate? Not so much. I hope I'm reasonably pleasant, but I'm notoriously hot-tempered and wildly excitable. The shape was obviously due to the melting. At least I'd avoided "sharply angled on both sides" whose characteristics include "looks for the easy way" and "has a big ego." According to the guidelines of the exercise (which I guess is for community-building and self-discovery?), I was now supposed to get into a group with everybody else who had a round tip and do some workshopping, discussing how people with our personality traits contributed to groups and stuff. I didn't really see how I, sitting alone in my apartment, working off a vaguely-remembered half-melted Prescriptives in "Berry" could really benefit from this, so I decided to shelve that for the next time I've got the whole secretarial pool at my disposal. But do feel free to learn about yourself. Similar to the original shape • Great follower • Abides by the rules • Does not like too much attention • A little self-conscious • Somewhat reserved • Likes a schedule • May occasionally color hair for fun. Flat top • Has high morals • To the point • Needs approval • Careful about appearance • Very dependable • Conservative • Quick minded Sharp-angled tip • Very opinionated • High-spirited • Dislikes schedules • Selective of friends • Outgoing • Likes attention • Can be Argumentative Flat top concave • Makes friends easily • Inquisitive • Makes a good detective • Adventurous • Likes to probe • Complex • Exciting Rounded, smooth tip • Easy-going • The peacemaker • Even-tempered • Very steady • Likeable • Generous • Pleasant to be around Sharp angles on both sides • Seeks attention • Spiritual • Curious • Mysterious • Has a big ego • Loves life • Looks for the easy way • Faithful Rounded tip to a point • Lovable • Family-oriented • A "doer" • Can give orders easily • Domestic • Sometimes exaggerates • Can be stubborn over little things • Needs people around Sharp-angled but curved tip • Creative • Enthusiastic • Energetic • Talkative • Loves attention • Falls in love easily • Helpful • Needs a schedule but dislikes one Lipstick Personality Profile


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The contour of your lipstick isn't all that important. I think you're in pretty good shape as long as your not using your lipstick to scrawl hateful things to yourself in the bathroom mirror while crying hysterically and drinking vodka.