Kenyan Man Is Prepared to Offer 50 Cows for Malia Obama

Felix Kiprono, a lawyer from Kenya, is in love with Malia Obama. And just in case you think he’s in it for The Wrong Reasons, well, he isn’t: “People might say I am after the family’s money, which is not the case. My love is real,” he told a Nairobi newspaper.

His love is so real, in fact, that he would like to offer the Obama family fifty cows, 70 sheep and 30 goats for 16-year-old Malia’s hand in marriage—according to CNN, a package worth up to $90,000. What a handsome bride price! “I got interested in her in 2008,” he said, according to CNN. “As a matter of fact, I haven’t dated anyone since and promise to be faithful to her.”

Malia!!! Take out your headphones and listen to this nice man! Weren’t you just talking about going Wwoofing after senior year?! This is the same thing, basically:

“Ours will be a simple life. I will teach Malia how to milk a cow, cook ugali (a porridge) and prepare mursik (a sour milk) like any other Kalenjin woman,” he said.

CNN writes that Kiprono is “currently working on a letter” announcing his intentions that he’ll then hand over to the U.S. Embassy. Love is in the air, everybody!