Katy Perry Taking Showbiz Hiatus to Slather Vaseline on Raw, Sensitive Cockles of Heart

Illustration for article titled Katy Perry Taking Showbiz Hiatus to Slather Vaseline on Raw, Sensitive Cockles of Heart

Katy Perry — now dating Ghostbuster Dan Florence + The Machine guitarist Robert Aykroyd — is taking a break from showbiz after her doc Katy Perry: Part Of Me is released, in order to let her heart and/or cupcake boobs heal after Aldous Snow poured Malibu rum all over them and devoured them en flambé. If she spends more than 14 months on this break, precisely the length of her marriage to Russell Brand, let's safely assume she's going straight Dominique Swain on us, vanishing into the ether, never to be seen again. No, but actually she'll be back in like a week after she's gone to her vacation house and massaged some more hit songs out of her smarting innards. [Musicrooms.net, Contact Music]


Illustration for article titled Katy Perry Taking Showbiz Hiatus to Slather Vaseline on Raw, Sensitive Cockles of Heart

National treasure Chris Pine told Jay Leno that no, he will not be playing Christian Grey in Fifty Shades of Grey, but he is flattered that so many people (nobody?) foisted it on him (asked him). "Look, I was on a red carpet in Las Vegas, and someone asked me and the only reason I knew about it is that every woman in my life has read this trilogy... And I said yeah sure, if it comes around, blah blah blah as you do [but] I'm not doing it, no." I think Dan Aykroyd should do it since he has all that free time from not dating Katy Perry. [News.com.au]

At the Isle of Wight festival, Kelis diplomatically fielded a question about ex-husband Nas' use of the bright green wedding dress in which she married him in 2005 on the cover of his 10th album, Life Is Good: "My feelings about it are not really relevant... For someone in hip-hop to kind of be genuine and honest, whatever the honesty is about, I think it's awesome. So my feelings about it aren't really necessarily valid, it's just the fact that as an artist I can respect that he wears his feelings on his sleeve." [Blackbook]

Illustration for article titled Katy Perry Taking Showbiz Hiatus to Slather Vaseline on Raw, Sensitive Cockles of Heart

71-year-old Jeopardy host Alex Trebek (as in "I put my underwear back on to investigate my hotel room robbery") is in good spirits at Cedar-Sinai after suffering a minor heart attack on Saturday, doubtlessly thanks to the shenanigans of Darell Hammond's Sean Connery. It is his second heart attack since 2007, after which he took a hiatus from the show to recover and continue sleeping in the nude. Should he take one this year, he'll be stiff competition for Dan Aykroyd in Fifty Shades of Grey. [LA Times]

Illustration for article titled Katy Perry Taking Showbiz Hiatus to Slather Vaseline on Raw, Sensitive Cockles of Heart

In February of this year, Rufus Wainwright's opera Prima Donna premiered in Brooklyn to little fanfare, and next time around he plans to get more personal: he's currently at work on a musical film called Great White Way, based loosely on his life. "We're really early in that process... Perhaps it's more of a kind of mythic Rufus that he's trying to create. It stems from some of my past glories and tragic endings, but it's by no means a biography of me or anything." Hard not to have high hopes for something with a title that sounds like Moby Dick fanfiction and/or pornography featuring the sexploits of a scrappy White Supremacist heroine. Right? RIGHT? [NME]

  • Jessie J got stuck in the porcelain throne at Watch The Throne and had to be rescued by Jay-Z's entourage. [Digital Spy]
  • What happens to the person who says "No, just... no" about a sartorial choice of Madonna's? Kylie Minogue's gonna find out. [Digital Spy]
  • Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt might marry in the UK. [Digital Spy]
  • Nothing takes away the sting of rejection except maybe the $10 million kiss-off Ann Curry is getting from NBC. Yam? Her? Really? [Showbiz Spy]
  • Aaron Eckhart and Jamie Foxx will play US presidents and Channing Tatum and Gerard Butler their Secret Service men in two different political thrillers that sound equally ab-y and pec-y. There will also be a less-ab-oriented, fusty and abrasive version starring Charlie Sheen and Mel Gibson. [Contact Music, Express]
  • "As a woman, [becoming a mother] is the most wonderful thing that can happen to you," says Penelope Cruz, to whom it can be safely asserted that many other wonderful things have happened. [Showbiz Spy]
  • Jenna Jameson was officially slapped with a DUI. [TMZ]
  • Sister Wives' Christine Brown admits that she does not trust her sister wives. Who knew polygamy had so many problems, you guys? [HuffPo]
  • Responding to allegations of 'Ye boyfriend fakery, Kim Kardashian says, "It's your heart you're playing with... I couldn't sacrifice my heart for a publicity stunt." Duh, of course not, since she has a bedazzled iPhone G4 where her heart should be. [HuffPo]
  • Seth MacFarlane and Rumer Willis palled around at an after-afterparty for his new movie Ted. All I can picture is the irreverent cutaway where Peter Griffin tells her she spells her name wrong and farts in her face. [NYDN]
  • fun. visited a New York children's' hospital and performed their carefully-altered hit single, "We Are (Uncommonly) Young (For This Debilitating Bone Disease.)" [Contact Music]
  • Eschewing Demi Moore romance rumors, Joe Manganiello was seen shepherding an errant blonde. [People]
  • Exes Rose McGowan and Marilyn Manson avoid each other. Stars: they're just like us. [Page Six]
  • Kristen Stewart was teased in school for not shaving her gams. [Gather Celebs]
  • Kate Middleton still has to curtsy to Sarah Ferguson, "Duchess of Pork" (remember those commercials?) and her kids, which doubtlessly grinds her gears. [News.com.au]
  • Rhys Ifans calls Spiderman a "spokesperson for a generation," but he should watch what he says or else the next movie's supervillain will be Lena Dunham and he'll be out of a job. [Blockbuster.co.uk]
  • Guess how many times Rihanna grabbed her crotch. One, two, three, four... fifty. Fifty times. Ah-ah-ah-ah. [The Sun.]
  • Good Samaritan Steve Carell answered phones for 45 minutes at an understaffed pizzeria. [Belfast Telegraph]
  • The eldest Hemsworth, Luke, 32, is joining brothers Liam and Chris in Los Angeles to pursue acting. I want a ballet-inspired fight with the Wilson brothers a la West Side Story. Cool! Yeah! Cool! Go! [Digital Spy]
  • An $800,000 lawsuit against DMX has been dropped. [WYTV]
  • Into Jessica Simpson's cleavage, never to be seen again. [Daily Mail]
  • Sigourney Weaver changed her name from "Susan" because she didn't feel that it was right for her imposing height, which is physically 6' even but emotionally "street level." [Contact Music]



Marginally related: my mother started reading 50 Shades recently, and nothing I can do seems to convince her it's terrible. Oddly enough, she literally seems more interested in the "psychology" than the sex. She's so concerned for poor Christian and his poor damaged soul! She also didn't believe me when I told her it was Twilight fanfiction and she generally thinks I'm a snob (my tastes are not that highbrow - hers are just terribly terrible), so that conversation went great. Either way, I can't wait to hear who she thinks should be in the stupid movie. Ugh.