Just in case you have nothing to do today AND happen to live in Brooklyn, the hipsters are having their very own wedding expo called the Lovesick Expo, where everything will (of course) be handcrafted, ironic, and mustachioed.

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I had a revelation when I moved away from my hometown (where every bride still gets a crusty spiral curl up-do and wears the equivalent of a strapless white prom gown despite her body type) that weddings could be "alternative". Shit, you mean I can put fireflies in jars on tables? And ride a two-seater bike away from the altar? And wear a cute little pillbox hat with some netting instead of a veil? HOLD THE PHONE. And then all my college friends had lovely twee weddings, and while they were all very beautiful, I have lost my own lust for it all. At this point—when and if the day comes—I just want to put on something pretty and retro, go to the courthouse, and then party at a bar somewhere. Just like grandma. :D But that's just me. You do you, Lovesick!