David Letterman is leaving this earth (rather, he’s leaving television, which is reportedly worse). As he does so, his biggest fans are coming by The Late Show to say goodbye. On Wednesday night, that meant a visit from Julia Roberts, who reminisced about how scared she was to visit Dave during her first appearance because of how mean he was to young actresses.

In 1988, Roberts released Mystic Pizza, and appeared on Letterman to promote it. She had no idea Letterman had thought the movie was “fantastic”; instead, she was very afraid:

I, as a fan of the show, did not want to come on because I had seen you absolutely dismember young actresses of my kind of peer group. And I thought, I’m going to go on and he’s going to know within 10 seconds what my IQ is. And you are going to, like a samurai, just sort of Benihana me into pieces and I’ll be left for dead and forgotten.

“I’m not gonna dispute this,” Letterman replied. But, he wanted to know, “what do you suppose was wrong with me? Why would I behave that way?” Fix me please!

“Stupid people annoy you,” Roberts responded. Well, I feel you there Dave. Surely there’s nothing else deeper going on here. Regardless, this seems like a great time to remember this Tina Fey favorite, Letterman’s classic interview with Paris Hilton from 2007.


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