America's most openly body-function-having sweetheart Jennifer Lawrence says she drunkenly threw up on Madonna's stairs after the Academy Awards. Stars: they're just like us!
As she vomited, says J-Law, Miley Cyrus happened upon her and said something along the lines of, "Get it together, girl!" — which is the true hallmark of absolute debauchery. That's like if Dionysus were to come across you reveling in the woods and say, "Honey, do you want me to call a cab?" Congrats to everyone involved in this momentous occurrence.
This story comes to the world via an audience member who saw the actress tell her tale of hardship and perseverance on Late Night With Seth Meyers. Jennifer-Lawrence-antics-talk is very precious, I guess, so we'll take it from whichever source is available. The actual episode airs May 21, if you would like to mark your calendar. [NY Daily News, US]
Ellen DeGeneres congratulated Ellen Page on coming out, and it was extremely heartwarming and lovely: "I am so proud of you for coming out, and I am so happy for you. I know what a scary thing that is," said DeGeneres. Page, who was visibly humbled, expressed her gratitude to the talk show host: "[I'm] grateful to you, because you did it in a time when it was much harder and much scarier."
Page went on to describe how much better her life is now. "I knew I would be a happier person. I knew that I was going to feel better, and I did not anticipate how happy I would feel," she said. "In every aspect of my life: just the ease and comfort. It's really been extraordinary to feel the shift. Overnight, too." OK I AM CRYING A BIT. [MTV]
Kim Kardashian has picked out her wedding dress, and she's decided to opt for a simple and understated pantsuit. JUST KIDDING: it is a top secret garment, designed by an "elite" human, and Kim "beyond loves it." Which means that it's probably a seductive heap of leather peplums with a matching crop top. [E!]
- 47 One Direction fans were treated for symptoms of asphyxia after excitedly jostling around the stage for too long. (Everyone is okay now, though.) [Billboard]
- Demi Lovato talked about wanting to be a role model for young girls: "When I was younger, I needed someone in the spotlight to idolize, who stood for positivity and light and happiness and wanted to change the world. And because I didn't have that, I realized, I want to do that, if only for my 12-year-old little sister." :') [E!]
- Here's how Connie Britton REALLY feels about Michelle Obama's cameo in Nashville: she thinks it's "exciting." Same, Connie. [HuffPo]
- Lindsay Lohan is probably not dating this married guy who wears a fedora (although she has fallen for the alluring charms of that specific style of hat before). [Gossip Cop]
- A high school student got Joe Jonas to endorse her for student council president. She then won the election, proving once and for all that democracy works. [Gossip Cop]
- Welcome to the Internet, Ronan Farrow eye color truthers!! [Page Six]
- Mariah Carey's new album is called "Me. I Am Mariah... The Elusive Chanteuse." Sounds chill. [Just Jared]
- Ariana Grande wore a hairstyle that was not her traditional half-pony, which is probably what caused the power in our office to go off for a second yesterday. [Just Jared]
- Diplo's mom did a totally embarrassing interview with Radar in which she talked about wanting to meet his Coachella gf Katy Perry. MOOOOOOMMM!!!!!! [Radar]